1 00:00:00,834 --> 00:00:02,803 RICHARD, PLEASE, WE ARE STARVING. 2 00:00:02,870 --> 00:00:04,638 I WILL BE RIGHT THERE, EMILY. 3 00:00:04,705 --> 00:00:06,006 THIS IS RIDICULOUS. 4 00:00:06,074 --> 00:00:08,842 HE WOKE UP THIS MORNING AND SUDDENLY JUST HAD TO HAVE 5 00:00:08,909 --> 00:00:10,944 THIS DISH THAT HIS GRANDMOTHER WOULD MAKE HIM. 6 00:00:11,011 --> 00:00:13,847 WE ALL UNDERSTAND THE CRAVINGS. IT'S A FAMILY SECRET. 7 00:00:13,914 --> 00:00:17,651 WELL, LAST TIME I CHECKED, I WAS FAMILY. HE'S HAVING FUN, GRANDMA. 8 00:00:17,718 --> 00:00:21,755 I SAW AN OPEN CAN OF CREAM OF MUSHROOM SOUP. NOTHING GOOD CAN COME OF THAT. 9 00:00:21,822 --> 00:00:24,825 HERE WE ARE -- A TREAT FOR THE MASSES. SMELLS GOOD. 10 00:00:24,892 --> 00:00:27,461 THIS WAS MY FAVORITE THING TO EAT AS A BOY. 11 00:00:27,528 --> 00:00:29,163 MY GRAN USED TO MAKE THIS 12 00:00:29,230 --> 00:00:30,998 WHENEVER I WAS FEELING A LITTLE SAD -- 13 00:00:31,065 --> 00:00:32,900 YOU KNOW, IF MY CRICKET TEAM LOST 14 00:00:32,966 --> 00:00:36,770 OR A GIRL I FANCIED TURNED UP HER NOSE AT ME. WELL, LOAD ME UP. 15 00:00:36,837 --> 00:00:38,806 THERE WAS THIS CUTE CHICK AT THE PHARMACY. 16 00:00:38,872 --> 00:00:41,242 I USED MY BEST MATERIAL ON HER AND NOTHING. 17 00:00:41,309 --> 00:00:42,676 AT LEAST LET PINA SERVE IT. 18 00:00:42,743 --> 00:00:44,312 NO COMMENT ON MY LESBIAN HILARITY. 19 00:00:44,378 --> 00:00:45,613 MY, HOW FAR WE'VE COME. 20 00:00:45,679 --> 00:00:48,182 PINA WILL SERVE TINY, PROPER SERVINGS. 21 00:00:48,249 --> 00:00:50,884 JOHNNY MACHETE NEEDS TO BE PRESENTED IN A HEAP. 22 00:00:50,951 --> 00:00:52,220 JOHNNY MACHETE? 23 00:00:52,286 --> 00:00:54,322 THAT'S THE NAME OF THIS VILE CONCOCTION. 24 00:00:54,388 --> 00:00:56,457 IT'S DELICIOUS. IT'S NOT BAD. 25 00:00:56,524 --> 00:00:58,025 IT'S 12 DIFFERENT COLORS. 26 00:00:58,092 --> 00:00:59,360 COME ON, MOM, EAT IT. 27 00:00:59,427 --> 00:01:00,828 IT LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE ALREADY DID. 28 00:01:00,894 --> 00:01:03,131 EMILY. I'M SORRY. I'M HAPPY YOU'RE HAPPY. 29 00:01:03,197 --> 00:01:07,601 AND TO PROVE IT, I WILL TAKE EXACTLY THREE BITES OF THIS BEFORE I THROW IT OUT. 30 00:01:07,668 --> 00:01:08,969 THANK YOU. YOU'RE WELCOME. 31 00:01:09,036 --> 00:01:10,271 SO, GOOD FOOD, GOOD COMPANY -- 32 00:01:10,338 --> 00:01:12,206 NOW LET'S MOVE ON TO GOOD CONVERSATION. 33 00:01:12,273 --> 00:01:14,275 RORY, WHAT IS NEW IN YOUR LIFE? 34 00:01:14,342 --> 00:01:17,611 WELL... FUNNY YOU SHOULD MENTION IT. 35 00:01:17,678 --> 00:01:19,213 NOW? WHY NOT? 36 00:01:19,280 --> 00:01:22,683 OKAY. MOM, DAD, WE HAVE SOME REALLY BIG NEWS. 37 00:01:22,750 --> 00:01:25,619 I GOT MY COLLEGE ACCEPTANCE LETTERS BACK. 38 00:01:25,686 --> 00:01:28,489 HARVARD, PRINCETON, AND YALE. 39 00:01:28,556 --> 00:01:31,392 AND AFTER GIVING IT A LOT OF THOUGHT, I HAVE DECIDED. 40 00:01:31,459 --> 00:01:34,228 I AM GOING TO YALE. 41 00:01:35,129 --> 00:01:37,431 DID YOU HEAR THAT? YALE. 42 00:01:41,902 --> 00:01:43,103 I'M GOING TO YALE. 43 00:01:43,171 --> 00:01:44,505 THAT'S WHERE YOU WENT, DAD. 44 00:01:44,572 --> 00:01:46,974 YOU LIKED IT, REMEMBER? PASS THE JOHNNY MACHETE. 45 00:01:47,040 --> 00:01:48,376 I DON'T UNDERSTAND. 46 00:01:48,442 --> 00:01:50,611 I THOUGHT YOU WANTED ME TO GO TO YALE. 47 00:01:50,678 --> 00:01:52,213 NO, WE DIDN'T. ABSOLUTELY NOT. 48 00:01:52,280 --> 00:01:53,547 WHAT GAVE YOU THAT IDEA? 49 00:01:53,614 --> 00:01:55,249 I KNOW WE'VE HAD OUR DIFFERENCES 50 00:01:55,316 --> 00:01:57,084 OVER WHERE RORY SHOULD GO TO SCHOOL, 51 00:01:57,151 --> 00:01:58,619 BUT THAT'S BEHIND US NOW. 52 00:01:58,686 --> 00:02:02,122 SHE'S GOING TO YALE, AND THAT'S GOOD -- REALLY GOOD. 53 00:02:02,190 --> 00:02:04,292 NOTHING BUT SMILES. 54 00:02:04,358 --> 00:02:06,059 WE'RE BOTH VERY HAPPY ABOUT IT. 55 00:02:06,126 --> 00:02:07,161 BOTH. 56 00:02:07,228 --> 00:02:08,629 HER AND ME. SHE AND I. 57 00:02:08,696 --> 00:02:11,064 EVERYBODY IN THIS ROOM NAMED LORELAI IS OVER THE MOON 58 00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:15,336 ABOUT THE GOING TO YALE. WHICH MEANS THAT EVERYBODY ELSE IN THIS ROOM NOT NAMED LORELAI 59 00:02:15,403 --> 00:02:18,406 CAN BE EQUALLY OVER THE MOON ABOUT THE GOING TO YALE. 60 00:02:20,408 --> 00:02:22,643 I'M GETTING THE CHAMPAGNE. I'M CALLING THE TALBOTS. 61 00:02:22,710 --> 00:02:25,446 MAKE SURE YOU GLOAT OVER THAT DIM-WITTED SON OF THEIRS 62 00:02:25,513 --> 00:02:27,281 WHO COULDN'T EVEN GET IN TO BROWN. 63 00:02:27,348 --> 00:02:29,617 SHE'S GOING TO YALE! SHE'S GOING TO YALE! 64 00:02:32,119 --> 00:02:35,155 WHEN I GET BACK, I'LL TEACH YOU THE FIGHT SONG. 65 00:02:37,325 --> 00:02:38,526 [ CHUCKLES ] 66 00:02:38,592 --> 00:02:42,230 * IF YOU'RE OUT ON THE ROAD * 67 00:02:42,296 --> 00:02:47,335 * FEELIN' LONELY AND SO COLD * 68 00:02:47,401 --> 00:02:50,904 * ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS CALL MY NAME * 69 00:02:50,971 --> 00:02:55,476 * AND I'LL BE THERE ON THE NEXT TRAIN * 70 00:02:55,543 --> 00:03:00,113 * WHERE YOU LEAD, I WILL FOLLOW * 71 00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:04,418 * ANYWHERE THAT YOU TELL ME TO * 72 00:03:04,485 --> 00:03:06,320 * IF YOU NEED * * IF YOU NEED * 73 00:03:06,387 --> 00:03:09,122 * YOU NEED ME TO BE WITH YOU * 74 00:03:09,189 --> 00:03:10,958 * I WILL FOLLOW * 75 00:03:11,024 --> 00:03:13,126 * OH, OH, OH * 76 00:03:13,193 --> 00:03:17,798 * WHERE YOU LEAD, I WILL FOLLOW * 77 00:03:17,865 --> 00:03:22,470 * ANY, ANYWHERE THAT YOU TELL ME TO * 78 00:03:22,536 --> 00:03:24,472 * IF YOU NEED * * IF YOU NEED * 79 00:03:24,538 --> 00:03:27,275 * YOU NEED ME TO BE WITH YOU * 80 00:03:27,341 --> 00:03:31,479 * I WILL FOLLOW WHERE YOU LEAD * 81 00:03:33,314 --> 00:03:34,882 SO? IT LOOKS BURNED. 82 00:03:34,948 --> 00:03:37,117 HOW LONG TO MAKE IT NOT LOOK BURNED? 83 00:03:37,184 --> 00:03:38,386 MAYBE TWO -- 84 00:03:38,452 --> 00:03:40,187 TOM, LET ME HELP YOU OUT. 85 00:03:40,254 --> 00:03:42,022 THE ANSWER I'M LOOKING FOR IS 10 DAYS, 86 00:03:42,089 --> 00:03:45,293 BECAUSE THAT'S WHEN I HAVE TO GET GUESTS BACK IN HERE AGAIN. 87 00:03:45,359 --> 00:03:47,661 OKAY, 10 DAYS. ARE YOU LYING TO ME? 88 00:03:47,728 --> 00:03:51,131 WHAT'S THE ANSWER YOU'RE LOOKING FOR THERE? NEVER MIND. JUST GO FAST. 89 00:03:51,198 --> 00:03:53,401 NEVER HEARD THAT ONE BEFORE. 90 00:03:53,467 --> 00:03:54,868 WELL, EVERYTHING'S FINE IN THE KITCHEN. 91 00:03:54,935 --> 00:03:57,004 WE HAVE TO GET THE GAS LINE RECONNECTED. 92 00:03:57,070 --> 00:04:00,274 HOW LONG WILL THAT TAKE? THE PLUMBER'S IN THERE NOW LOOKING AT EVERYTHING. 93 00:04:00,341 --> 00:04:03,944 WE FORGOT TO CALL THE RAPPAPORTS, AND THEY SHOWED UP. WHAT DID YOU DO? 94 00:04:04,011 --> 00:04:07,848 WELL, I CONVINCED THEM THEY GOT THEIR DAYS MIXED UP, AND I SENT THEM HOME. 95 00:04:07,915 --> 00:04:11,852 YOU DIDN'T EVEN TRY TO GET THEM A ROOM SOMEWHERE ELSE? YOU'RE WELCOME. 96 00:04:11,919 --> 00:04:14,422 HEY, LAURA, TRY TO TRACK DOWN THE RAPPAPORTS 97 00:04:14,488 --> 00:04:17,090 AND SEE IF YOU CAN GET THEM INTO THE BUNNYHOP INN. 98 00:04:17,157 --> 00:04:19,760 OKAY, GRAB A SEAT AND LET'S GET THE MEETING STARTED. 99 00:04:19,827 --> 00:04:21,529 I'M HERE. I BROUGHT BAGELS. 100 00:04:21,595 --> 00:04:23,531 OH, TOBIN, GREAT. I'M STARVING. 101 00:04:23,597 --> 00:04:25,165 NORMALLY, I WOULDN'T THINK OF IT, 102 00:04:25,232 --> 00:04:26,600 BECAUSE WHAT BAGEL STANDS A CHANCE 103 00:04:26,667 --> 00:04:29,737 NEXT TO SOOKIE'S MAGICAL MUFFINS AND SCONES? 104 00:04:29,803 --> 00:04:31,605 OH, TOBIN, STOP. 105 00:04:31,672 --> 00:04:34,442 TWO FULL PANTS SIZES, MY FRIEND, ALL BECAUSE OF YOU. 106 00:04:34,508 --> 00:04:36,510 WHAT IS HE DOING HERE? 107 00:04:36,577 --> 00:04:38,679 HE IS THE NIGHT MANAGER. IT'S DAY. 108 00:04:38,746 --> 00:04:40,714 MICHEL, THIS IS AN EMERGENCY STAFF MEETING. 109 00:04:40,781 --> 00:04:44,785 I NEED HIM HERE. I TOLD YOU I CANNOT BE IN THE SAME ROOM WITH HIM. 110 00:04:44,852 --> 00:04:47,488 IT'S AN HOUR OUT OF YOUR LIFE. DEAL WITH IT. 111 00:04:47,555 --> 00:04:49,857 HOLD IT. IN CASE OF SOOT. 112 00:04:49,923 --> 00:04:52,426 YOU'RE VERY SWEET. 113 00:04:52,493 --> 00:04:53,961 WAIT, WAIT. 114 00:04:54,027 --> 00:04:57,030 LET'S LET THE DRY CLEANERS DRUM UP THEIR OWN BUSINESS, HUH? 115 00:04:57,097 --> 00:04:58,966 [ LAUGHTER ] 116 00:04:59,032 --> 00:05:00,267 MY CHAIR. 117 00:05:00,334 --> 00:05:01,869 OH, I'M SORRY. 118 00:05:05,906 --> 00:05:08,409 OKAY, SO, SHOULD WE GET A ROOM OR WHAT? 119 00:05:08,476 --> 00:05:10,444 WILL YOU JUST START YOUR MEETING? 120 00:05:10,511 --> 00:05:12,012 ALRIGHT, HERE'S THE SITUATION. 121 00:05:12,079 --> 00:05:14,648 EXCUSE ME, LORELAI. MICHEL, DID YOU GET A BAGEL? 122 00:05:14,715 --> 00:05:17,150 I DON'T WANT A BAGEL. ARE YOU SURE? THEY'RE KOSHER. 123 00:05:17,217 --> 00:05:20,120 I DON'T EAT BAGELS. BAGELS ARE LIKE GLUE IN YOUR INTESTINES. 124 00:05:20,187 --> 00:05:22,356 IT ENSURES THAT EVERYTHING THAT ENTERS YOUR BODY 125 00:05:22,423 --> 00:05:24,257 WILL REMAIN THERE UNTIL YOU DIE. 126 00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:26,860 EWW! SHUT UP. OKAY, LET'S FOCUS. 127 00:05:26,927 --> 00:05:31,965 AS YOU KNOW, THE FIRE PRETTY MUCH WIPED OUT THE DINING ROOM AND FIVE OF THE UPSTAIRS ROOMS. 128 00:05:32,032 --> 00:05:33,401 TOBIN, ARE YOU OKAY? 129 00:05:33,467 --> 00:05:36,003 I JUST...I JUST LOVE THIS PLACE SO MUCH. 130 00:05:36,069 --> 00:05:38,472 I'VE BEEN THE NIGHT MANAGER HERE FOR FIVE YEARS, 131 00:05:38,539 --> 00:05:40,774 AND I SPEND SO MUCH TIME WALKING THESE HALLS, 132 00:05:40,841 --> 00:05:43,343 LISTENING FOR FRIENDLY GHOSTS FLYING AROUND -- 133 00:05:43,411 --> 00:05:45,045 MAKE A POINT, BAGEL BOY. 134 00:05:45,112 --> 00:05:47,681 IT JUST HURTS ME TO SEE IT WOUNDED, THAT'S ALL. 135 00:05:47,748 --> 00:05:49,216 WELL, IT WON'T BE WOUNDED FOREVER. 136 00:05:49,282 --> 00:05:52,486 WE WILL REBUILD, AND WE'LL BE BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER. 137 00:05:52,553 --> 00:05:55,523 WE JUST NEED TO KEEP IT GOING UNTIL THEN. 138 00:05:55,589 --> 00:05:57,925 SO I NEED SOME IDEAS ON WHAT TO DO. 139 00:05:57,991 --> 00:06:00,428 YOU KNOW, I WAS THINKING -- I'M SORRY. MAY I? 140 00:06:00,494 --> 00:06:01,962 NO. GO AHEAD. 141 00:06:02,029 --> 00:06:04,532 A CELEBRITY WOULD GENERATE A LOT OF PUBLICITY. 142 00:06:04,598 --> 00:06:06,767 BUT HOW COULD WE GET A CELEBRITY IN HERE? 143 00:06:06,834 --> 00:06:08,636 I KNOW TONY RANDALL AND RENEE ESTEVEZ. 144 00:06:08,702 --> 00:06:10,671 I'D BE HAPPY TO PUT IN A CALL. 145 00:06:10,738 --> 00:06:12,305 LOOK, I HATE TO BRING THIS UP, 146 00:06:12,372 --> 00:06:14,942 ESPECIALLY SINCE, I MEAN, HOW DO YOU TOP RENEE ESTEVEZ, 147 00:06:15,008 --> 00:06:17,177 BUT WE HAVE A SMALL NUMBER OF ROOMS, YES? 148 00:06:17,244 --> 00:06:20,080 THE LOBBY'S FINE, AND SOOKIE CAN MAKE CERTAIN THINGS AT HOME -- 149 00:06:20,147 --> 00:06:23,517 MUFFINS, BAKED GOODS, JAMS, ET CETERA. 150 00:06:23,584 --> 00:06:25,486 SO THAT'S BREAKFAST, AND WE HAVE BEDS, 151 00:06:25,553 --> 00:06:29,356 AND IF WE ADD SOME FREE WINE AND CHEESE AROUND 5:00 IN THE AFTERNOON. 152 00:06:29,423 --> 00:06:32,460 NO, WE'RE NOT BECOMING A BED AND BREAKFAST. YOU'RE BEING STUBBORN. 153 00:06:32,526 --> 00:06:34,394 BED AND BREAKFASTS ARE CUTESY AND ANNOYING. 154 00:06:34,462 --> 00:06:37,230 IT FORCES PEOPLE TO MINGLE. I DO NOT SUPPORT THE MINGLING. 155 00:06:37,297 --> 00:06:40,901 ADDING A LITTLE GIMMICK WILL BE INCENTIVE FOR PEOPLE TO KEEP THEIR RESERVATIONS. 156 00:06:40,968 --> 00:06:44,772 YOU KNOW WHAT? I HATE TO SAY IT, NOT BEING A B and B MAN MYSELF, 157 00:06:44,838 --> 00:06:46,306 BUT MICHEL IS MAKING SENSE. 158 00:06:46,373 --> 00:06:47,875 GET OFF MY SIDE IMMEDIATELY. 159 00:06:47,941 --> 00:06:50,143 ALRIGHT, I'LL CONSIDER IT. 160 00:06:50,210 --> 00:06:53,213 SURE, IF HE SAYS IT, YOU WILL CONSIDER IT. 161 00:06:53,280 --> 00:06:54,815 I GOT TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING. 162 00:06:54,882 --> 00:06:57,885 IS IT BAD? NO, IT'S GREAT. YOU'RE GONNA BE THRILLED. 163 00:06:57,951 --> 00:06:59,953 WARM UP. CARTWHEELS ARE COMING. 164 00:07:00,020 --> 00:07:03,356 KEEP TALKING. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK. 165 00:07:03,423 --> 00:07:04,892 EXCUSE ME, LORELAI. 166 00:07:04,958 --> 00:07:06,727 LISTEN, I KNOW YOU'RE CRAZED RIGHT NOW, 167 00:07:06,794 --> 00:07:09,797 BUT I ALSO REMEMBERED THAT YOUR BIRTHDAY IS COMING UP ON FRIDAY, 168 00:07:09,863 --> 00:07:11,832 AND, WELL, I GOT YOU A LITTLE SOMETHING. 169 00:07:11,899 --> 00:07:13,934 OH, YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO DO THAT. 170 00:07:14,001 --> 00:07:15,368 IT'S VERY SMALL. 171 00:07:15,435 --> 00:07:17,004 TOBIN, I LOVE CANDLES. 172 00:07:17,070 --> 00:07:18,739 AND IT'S SCENTED -- CAPPUCCINO. 173 00:07:18,806 --> 00:07:20,240 GOD, THAT SMELLS GREAT. 174 00:07:20,307 --> 00:07:22,810 I'M REALLY GLAD YOU LIKE IT. I DO. THANKS. 175 00:07:22,876 --> 00:07:24,812 AND, LISTEN, I'M THE NIGHT MANAGER HERE, 176 00:07:24,878 --> 00:07:27,080 AND I'M VERY PROUD TO BE THE NIGHT MANAGER, 177 00:07:27,147 --> 00:07:29,517 BUT WITH EVERYTHING SO WACKY CRAZY AROUND HERE RIGHT NOW, 178 00:07:29,583 --> 00:07:32,920 IF YOU NEED SOME EXTRA HELP DURING THE DAY, PLEASE CALL ME. 179 00:07:32,986 --> 00:07:35,823 I MAY TAKE YOU UP ON THAT OFFER, TOBIN. THANKS. 180 00:07:43,531 --> 00:07:45,966 STAIRS SQUEAK. STAIRS SQUEAK. 181 00:07:46,033 --> 00:07:48,602 THERE'S A CHIP ON THE BANISTER. CHIP ON THE BANISTER. 182 00:07:48,669 --> 00:07:50,504 THE PAINT'S CHIPPED IN THE ARCHWAY, 183 00:07:50,571 --> 00:07:53,774 AND THERE'S A BOARD LOOSE IN THE ENTRYWAY, 184 00:07:53,841 --> 00:07:55,643 AND THE CHIMNEY NEEDS TO BE SWEPT. 185 00:07:55,709 --> 00:07:57,778 MOM, LUKE CANNOT SWEEP OUR CHIMNEY. WHY NOT? 186 00:07:57,845 --> 00:08:00,614 YOU NEED TO BE A CHIMNEY SWEEP TO SWEEP A CHIMNEY. 187 00:08:00,681 --> 00:08:03,250 IF DICK VAN DYKE CAN DO IT, SO CAN LUKE. 188 00:08:03,316 --> 00:08:04,985 LUKE IS GOING TO BE VERY SORRY. 189 00:08:05,052 --> 00:08:07,921 HEY, LUKE HAS GIVEN ME FIVE FREE HOURS OF HANDYMAN WORK 190 00:08:07,988 --> 00:08:09,957 FOR MY BIRTHDAY FOR THE LAST FIVE YEARS. 191 00:08:10,023 --> 00:08:12,392 YOU HAVE GROSSLY EXPLOITED THAT FOR THE PAST FOUR YEARS. 192 00:08:12,459 --> 00:08:15,729 I DIDN'T MILK IT THE FIRST YEAR LIKE I SHOULD HAVE. 193 00:08:15,796 --> 00:08:17,998 THE SPIRIT OF GIVING IS COMPLETELY LOST ON YOU. 194 00:08:18,065 --> 00:08:20,433 BUT THE SPIRIT OF GETTING IS ALIVE AND WELL. 195 00:08:20,500 --> 00:08:21,769 IT WANTS ITS CHIMNEY SWEPT. 196 00:08:21,835 --> 00:08:23,170 OOH! PUT DOWN LAUNDRY, TOO. 197 00:08:23,236 --> 00:08:25,205 THEN CAN HE ALSO BUILD ME ANOTHER BOOKSHELF? 198 00:08:25,272 --> 00:08:28,475 I'VE NEVER BEEN PROUDER OF YOU THAN I AM AT THIS MOMENT. 199 00:08:28,542 --> 00:08:30,711 AND TELL HIM TO PAINT LITTLE FLOWERS ON IT. 200 00:08:30,778 --> 00:08:33,914 'CAUSE HE'S SO GOOD WITH THE FLORALS. HELLO? 201 00:08:33,981 --> 00:08:37,585 I FINISHED THE PAPER ON DICKINSON, THE PHYSICS TEST WAS FOR A THIRD GRADER, 202 00:08:37,651 --> 00:08:41,188 I PICKED THE HISTORY OF THE EGYPTIAN POLITICAL PROCESS AS MY INTERNATIONAL-HISTORY PROJECT. 203 00:08:41,254 --> 00:08:43,423 YOU'VE BEEN VERY BUSY. I'VE BEEN VERY BORED. 204 00:08:43,490 --> 00:08:45,392 WHEN ARE YOU COMING BACK TO SCHOOL? 205 00:08:45,458 --> 00:08:48,829 TOMORROW. MY MOM'S BRINGING HOME A NEW FACE. THERE'S A DOCTOR IN FRANCE 206 00:08:48,896 --> 00:08:53,867 WHO INJECTS SOME KIND OF GEL INTO YOUR HEAD AND THEN MOLDS IT TO GIVE YOU BETTER CHEEKBONES. 207 00:08:53,934 --> 00:08:55,736 SHE NEEDS TO SLEEP ON HER BACK. 208 00:08:55,803 --> 00:08:59,339 OTHERWISE, HER FACE WILL FLATTEN LIKE A CREPE. OH, MY GOD. IT'S "BRAZIL." 209 00:08:59,406 --> 00:09:03,410 I'LL PROBABLY HAVE TO GO BACK TO SCHOOL WHEN THEY GET HOME. IT WILL BE FINE. 210 00:09:03,476 --> 00:09:05,913 ARE PEOPLE STILL TALKING ABOUT MY MELTDOWN SPEECH? 211 00:09:05,979 --> 00:09:07,114 NO. 212 00:09:07,180 --> 00:09:08,916 WHO CARES WHAT THEY'RE SAYING, PARIS? 213 00:09:08,982 --> 00:09:11,652 GIVE ME MORE HOMEWORK. IT'LL KEEP MY MIND OFF MY LIFE. 214 00:09:11,719 --> 00:09:15,522 THERE IS NO MORE. I THINK YOU'VE ALMOST FINISHED YOUR FIRST YEAR OF COLLEGE. 215 00:09:15,589 --> 00:09:17,357 I CAN'T JUST SIT HERE. I'LL GO CRAZY. 216 00:09:17,424 --> 00:09:19,993 WHY DON'T YOU GO OUT AND DO SOMETHING FUN? LIKE WHAT? 217 00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:24,698 IT'S YOUR LAST DAY OF FREEDOM. GO BE WILD, GO CRAZY. DON'T THINK, JUST DO. 218 00:09:24,765 --> 00:09:26,166 DO WHAT? YOU'RE THINKING. 219 00:09:26,233 --> 00:09:27,735 WHAT IF -- 220 00:09:27,801 --> 00:09:30,370 PARIS, DON'T THINK. OKAY, I WON'T THINK. 221 00:09:30,437 --> 00:09:32,706 I'LL SEE YOU TOMORROW. 222 00:09:32,773 --> 00:09:35,008 DO YOU THINK LUKE CAN KNOCK THIS WALL OUT 223 00:09:35,075 --> 00:09:37,244 AND BUILD US A BIGGER KITCHEN IN FIVE HOURS? 224 00:09:37,310 --> 00:09:40,781 YOU'LL HAVE TO DROP THE LAUNDRY. NEVER MIND. OH, MY GOD, I'M EXHAUSTED. 225 00:09:40,848 --> 00:09:43,150 ARE YOU TOO EXHAUSTED TO TALK ABOUT BIRTHDAY WEEK? 226 00:09:43,216 --> 00:09:45,619 I'M NEVER TOO TIRED TO TALK ABOUT BIRTHDAY WEEK. 227 00:09:45,686 --> 00:09:47,988 OKAY, SO, MONDAY I THOUGHT WE'D START 228 00:09:48,055 --> 00:09:49,857 WITH FACIALS AT SLOOPY'S AFTER SCHOOL. 229 00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:51,491 MUDPACK MONDAY. I LOVE IT. 230 00:09:51,558 --> 00:09:54,594 THEN WE'LL HAVE DOUBLE-FEATURE TUESDAY, SEPHORA WEDNESDAY, 231 00:09:54,662 --> 00:09:56,496 COMPLIMENTARY-MAKEOVER THURSDAY, 232 00:09:56,563 --> 00:09:59,266 AND THEN BIG, FAT, FABULOUS FRIDAY. 233 00:09:59,332 --> 00:10:01,134 D-DAY. B-D-DAY. 234 00:10:01,201 --> 00:10:04,204 CULMINATING IN THE FABULOUS BLOWOUT OF A PARTY YOU'RE PLANNING. 235 00:10:04,271 --> 00:10:06,306 OH, I'M SORRY. YOU WANTED A PARTY? 236 00:10:06,373 --> 00:10:09,142 I TOLD EVERYONE YOU DIDN'T WANT TO MAKE A BIG DEAL. 237 00:10:09,209 --> 00:10:11,979 MISS PATTY AND BABETTE WANTED TO HIRE THESE TWO HOT GUYS 238 00:10:12,045 --> 00:10:14,414 TO CARRY YOU AROUND ALL DAY AND FEED YOU BONBONS, 239 00:10:14,481 --> 00:10:17,050 AND KIRK WANTED TO HIRE THE RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS 240 00:10:17,117 --> 00:10:20,954 BUT I SAID, "PLEASE RESPECT THE LADY'S WISHES. 241 00:10:21,021 --> 00:10:22,656 SHE DESERVES THAT AT HER AGE." 242 00:10:22,723 --> 00:10:24,892 WHY ARE YOU SO COOL? I HAVE TO GO. 243 00:10:24,958 --> 00:10:26,426 WHERE? NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. 244 00:10:26,493 --> 00:10:29,096 YOU ARE PLANNING SOMETHING FOR FRIDAY NIGHT, AREN'T YOU? 245 00:10:29,162 --> 00:10:32,199 TELL PEOPLE I JUST COULDN'T ACCEPT A NEW CAR. 246 00:10:32,265 --> 00:10:35,068 IT WOULD BE BENEATH ME, AND I'D BE COMPLETELY HUMILIATED. 247 00:10:35,135 --> 00:10:38,038 AND A CONVERTIBLE WOULD JUST MAKE ME FLING MYSELF 248 00:10:38,105 --> 00:10:39,239 OFF A BUILDING. 249 00:10:39,306 --> 00:10:40,640 BYE. BYE. 250 00:10:40,708 --> 00:10:43,010 HELLO? LORELAI GILMORE? 251 00:10:43,076 --> 00:10:45,312 I'M CALLING FROM RICHARD GILMORE'S OFFICE. 252 00:10:45,378 --> 00:10:47,715 NEVER HEARD OF HIM. RICHARD GILMORE YOUR FATHER. 253 00:10:47,781 --> 00:10:49,482 OH, TALL, BOW TIE? YES. 254 00:10:49,549 --> 00:10:51,251 I'M WITH YOU NOW. GO AHEAD. 255 00:10:51,318 --> 00:10:53,486 WELL, HE'D LIKE TO SET UP AN APPOINTMENT 256 00:10:53,553 --> 00:10:56,757 TO MEET YOU FOR COFFEE. WOULD TOMORROW WORK FOR YOU, 2:00? 257 00:10:56,824 --> 00:10:58,759 MAKE THAT 3:00, KAREN. 258 00:10:58,826 --> 00:11:00,794 I HAVE THAT CONFERENCE CALL AT 2:00. 259 00:11:00,861 --> 00:11:03,596 IS THAT MY FATHER? PUT HIM ON THE PHONE, PLEASE. 260 00:11:03,663 --> 00:11:05,498 BUT -- HAND IT OVER, HONEY. 261 00:11:05,565 --> 00:11:07,334 COME ON, LET'S GO. CHOP-CHOP. 262 00:11:07,400 --> 00:11:09,970 WHAT ARE YOU DOING? SHE WANTS TO TALK TO YOU. 263 00:11:10,037 --> 00:11:12,205 TELL HER I'LL MEET HER TOMORROW. IT DIDN'T WORK. 264 00:11:12,272 --> 00:11:14,441 BUT I PAY YOU TO MAKE MY APPOINTMENTS. 265 00:11:14,507 --> 00:11:15,876 DAD! 266 00:11:16,543 --> 00:11:18,245 LORELAI, HELLO. 267 00:11:18,311 --> 00:11:21,481 YOU WERE SITTING RIGHT NEXT TO THIS WOMAN WHILE SHE CALLED ME? 268 00:11:21,548 --> 00:11:24,651 SHE'S MY SECRETARY, LORELAI. YOU WERE SITTING RIGHT THERE? 269 00:11:24,718 --> 00:11:28,321 THIS IS THE WAY A PROPER BUSINESS IS CONDUCTED. TWO FEET FROM THE PHONE. 270 00:11:28,388 --> 00:11:31,391 I'M NOT GONNA ARGUE WITH YOU. ARE YOU AVAILABLE TOMORROW OR NOT? 271 00:11:31,458 --> 00:11:34,227 WHAT IS THIS, DAD? I HAVE SOMETHING TO DISCUSS WITH YOU. 272 00:11:34,294 --> 00:11:36,429 DISCUSS IT NOW. I DON'T HAVE TIME NOW. 273 00:11:36,496 --> 00:11:39,099 PUT MRS. HUH-WIGGINS ON THE PHONE. HAVE HER TELL ME. 274 00:11:39,166 --> 00:11:42,469 CAN YOU MEET ME TOMORROW AT 3:00 OR NOT? FINE. WHERE? 275 00:11:42,535 --> 00:11:46,106 KAREN WILL CALL YOU TOMORROW TO CONFIRM IT AND TELL YOU THE PLACE. 276 00:11:46,173 --> 00:11:48,008 WHY CAN'T YOU JUST TELL ME NOW? 277 00:11:48,075 --> 00:11:50,243 LEAVE ME JUST A SEMBLANCE OF MY STRUCTURE, PLEASE. 278 00:11:50,310 --> 00:11:53,847 FINE. I'LL TALK TO THE WOMAN RIGHT NEXT TO YOU TOMORROW. 279 00:11:57,717 --> 00:12:00,187 SO THAT'S A 4-FOOT CHOCOLATE CAKE 280 00:12:00,253 --> 00:12:03,023 WITH INDIVIDUAL VANILLA CUPCAKES ON TOP 281 00:12:03,090 --> 00:12:07,560 SPELLING OUT "HAPPY 16th BIRTHDAY, LORELAI. THAT'S RIGHT. 282 00:12:07,627 --> 00:12:10,330 WOULD YOU LIKE BUTTERCREAM OR WHIP-CREAM FROSTING ON THAT? 283 00:12:10,397 --> 00:12:13,000 CAN YOU DO BOTH? THAT'S A LOT OF FROSTING. 284 00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:15,035 I KNOW, BUT IT'S MY MOM'S FAVORITE PART. 285 00:12:15,102 --> 00:12:17,670 ONCE WE TRIED TO MAKE A CAKE ENTIRELY OUT OF FROSTING, 286 00:12:17,737 --> 00:12:20,941 WHICH TURNED OUT TO BE BETTER IN THEORY THAN IN ACTUAL EXECUTION. 287 00:12:21,008 --> 00:12:22,810 WELL, BOTH FROSTINGS IT IS THEN. 288 00:12:22,876 --> 00:12:26,880 WHAT TIME DO YOU WANT IT? MISS PATTY WILL PICK IT UP AROUND 5:00. 289 00:12:26,947 --> 00:12:28,615 YOU'RE ALL SET. THANKS, FRAN. 290 00:12:28,681 --> 00:12:30,183 WE HAVE A GLITCH. 291 00:12:30,250 --> 00:12:33,887 APPARENTLY, THE WORLD'S LARGEST PIZZA WAS 122 FEET, 8 INCHES. 292 00:12:33,954 --> 00:12:35,355 IT SAYS IT RIGHT THERE. 293 00:12:35,422 --> 00:12:37,224 WELL, OBVIOUSLY, WE CAN'T DO THAT. 294 00:12:37,290 --> 00:12:40,160 THEN WE'LL HAVE TO MAKE IT THE LARGEST PIZZA IN CONNECTICUT. 295 00:12:40,227 --> 00:12:42,830 ACTUALLY, LITCHFIELD MADE ONE LAST YEAR THAT WAS 98 FEET. 296 00:12:42,896 --> 00:12:45,065 THE BEST THEY COULD DO WAS A 12 FOOTER. 297 00:12:45,132 --> 00:12:47,500 MAYBE YOU COULD MAKE HER THE BIGGEST SOMETHING ELSE. 298 00:12:47,567 --> 00:12:48,869 LIKE WHAT? TACO? 299 00:12:48,936 --> 00:12:51,038 THAT WOULD BE A LITTLE DIFFICULT TO SERVE. 300 00:12:51,104 --> 00:12:53,073 IT WOULD DEFINITELY BE MORE OF A COMMITMENT. 301 00:12:53,140 --> 00:12:55,542 WE'LL JUST TELL HER IT'S THE WORLD'S BIGGEST PIZZA. 302 00:12:55,608 --> 00:12:57,310 LIE? IT'S FOR HER OWN GOOD. 303 00:12:57,377 --> 00:12:59,079 HOW'S THE MUSIC SELECTION COMING? 304 00:12:59,146 --> 00:13:00,948 GOOD. I'VE DECIDED TO CHOOSE ONE SONG 305 00:13:01,014 --> 00:13:02,415 FROM EACH YEAR IN LORELAI'S LIFE. 306 00:13:02,482 --> 00:13:04,517 I'VE HIT A SNAG IN 1974. BAD YEAR? 307 00:13:04,584 --> 00:13:06,987 IT'S MAKING THE YEAR OF THE MACARENA LOOK INSPIRED. 308 00:13:07,054 --> 00:13:09,923 CAN YOU STASH THIS AT YOUR HOUSE TILL THE PARTY? 309 00:13:09,990 --> 00:13:11,825 IRONIC, ISN'T IT -- 310 00:13:11,892 --> 00:13:13,861 YOU HAVING TO HIDE THINGS AT MY HOUSE? 311 00:13:13,927 --> 00:13:15,262 LIFE HAS COME FULL CIRCLE. 312 00:13:15,328 --> 00:13:18,098 HEY, I GOT THE VIDEO FOR TONIGHT -- "ALMOST FAMOUS." 313 00:13:18,165 --> 00:13:20,333 NO, NOT AGAIN. I CAN'T HELP IT. I'M ADDICTED. 314 00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:22,169 IF I'M GOING TO SPEND TWO HOURS 315 00:13:22,235 --> 00:13:23,937 WATCHING KATE HUDSON COMMIT SUICIDE AGAIN, 316 00:13:24,004 --> 00:13:25,438 THEN WE ARE ORDERING INDIAN FOOD. 317 00:13:25,505 --> 00:13:27,274 LAST NIGHT, WHEN WE WATCHED "ED WOOD," 318 00:13:27,340 --> 00:13:29,309 WE GOT BURGERS LIKE YOU WANTED TO. 319 00:13:29,376 --> 00:13:32,980 TONIGHT, INDIAN FOOD, BUT TOMORROW, "SATURDAY NIGHT FEVER" AND THAI FOOD. 320 00:13:33,046 --> 00:13:35,849 YOU'RE LIKE A REALLY SWEET, OLD, AGORAPHOBIC COUPLE. 321 00:13:35,916 --> 00:13:39,219 OKAY, I'VE GOTTA GO. BYE. BYE. 322 00:13:39,286 --> 00:13:42,355 SO, IT'S BEEN A COUPLE DAYS SINCE YOU MADE THE BIG DECISION. 323 00:13:42,422 --> 00:13:44,491 YOU STILL GOING TO YALE? YES, I AM. 324 00:13:44,557 --> 00:13:47,560 IT'S GOT ALL THE CLASSES I WANT AND SOME REALLY GREAT TEACHERS. 325 00:13:47,627 --> 00:13:50,263 PLUS, AS AN ADDED BONUS, IT'S REALLY CLOSE TO HERE. 326 00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:52,365 22.8 MILES. HOW'D YOU KNOW THAT? 327 00:13:52,432 --> 00:13:53,566 DO YOU YAHOO!? 328 00:13:53,633 --> 00:13:54,834 YOU LOOKED IT UP? YEAH. 329 00:13:54,902 --> 00:13:56,603 YOU LOOKED IT UP. 330 00:13:56,669 --> 00:14:00,073 I JUST HIT A COUPLE BUTTONS ON A COMPUTER. YOU LOOKED IT UP. 331 00:14:00,140 --> 00:14:03,410 I WAS BORED. THERE WAS NOTHING ON TV, AND I WAS FOOLING AROUND. 332 00:14:03,476 --> 00:14:07,347 IT WAS SOMETHING TO DO. THAT'S IT. YOU LOOKED IT UP. 333 00:14:07,414 --> 00:14:09,682 I'D LIKE THE WORDING TO BE A LITTLE HARSHER. 334 00:14:09,749 --> 00:14:13,353 TAYLOR, IT ALREADY SAYS THAT IF AUNT TILLY'S TAFFY DELIVERS EVEN TWO HOURS LATE, 335 00:14:13,420 --> 00:14:15,388 THEY FORFEIT ALL PAYMENT FOR THAT PARTICULAR SHIPMENT 336 00:14:15,455 --> 00:14:18,525 AND ARE LIABLE FOR ANY LOSS OF INCOME THAT MAY RESULT. 337 00:14:18,591 --> 00:14:19,960 IT'S PRETTY EXTREME. 338 00:14:20,027 --> 00:14:21,294 WELL, IT MAY SEEM EXTREME 339 00:14:21,361 --> 00:14:23,263 THESE CANDY PEOPLE ARE SHIFTY CHARACTERS. 340 00:14:23,330 --> 00:14:28,001 WHY DON'T WE LEAVE THE WORDING LIKE IT IS FOR NOW AND SEE HOW THINGS GO? 341 00:14:28,068 --> 00:14:30,437 YEAH, YOU CAN SEND OVER A COUPLE OF OOMPA LOOMPAS 342 00:14:30,503 --> 00:14:32,472 TO KICK THE CRAP OUT OF AUNT TILLY. 343 00:14:32,539 --> 00:14:34,674 ARE YOU STILL DATING HIM? YES, I AM. 344 00:14:34,741 --> 00:14:38,545 WHY? IF YOU'RE LONELY, I HAVE A NEPHEW I WOULD LOVE TO INTRODUCE TO YOU. 345 00:14:38,611 --> 00:14:42,015 HE JUST GOT BACK FROM A 3-YEAR STINT IN A BIOSPHERE IN ARIZONA. 346 00:14:42,082 --> 00:14:43,716 CAN I GIVE HIM YOUR NUMBER? NO. 347 00:14:43,783 --> 00:14:46,819 I'M NOT TALKING TO YOU. IT'S MY LUCKY DAY. IS HE DONE? 348 00:14:46,886 --> 00:14:50,290 WE'LL LEAVE IT YOUR WAY AND SEE HOW IT WORKS OUT. 349 00:14:51,558 --> 00:14:53,626 SO, LISTEN, AFTER I DISPOSE OF TAYLOR'S BODY, 350 00:14:53,693 --> 00:14:56,096 ARE WE HITTING A MOVIE TONIGHT? YEAH, WE ARE. 351 00:14:56,163 --> 00:14:58,398 LUKE, COULD YOU SIT FOR A SECOND, PLEASE? 352 00:14:58,465 --> 00:15:00,733 I COULD. COULD YOU DO IT SOON? 353 00:15:00,800 --> 00:15:03,570 IF I SIT DOWN, ARE WE GONNA HAVE THE CONVERSATION? 354 00:15:03,636 --> 00:15:05,905 LUKE, PLEASE. 355 00:15:05,973 --> 00:15:08,908 HERE COMES THE CONVERSATION. 356 00:15:08,976 --> 00:15:10,443 MY PARENTS ARE COMING INTO TOWN, 357 00:15:10,510 --> 00:15:12,479 AND I'M GOING TO HAVE LUNCH WITH THEM, 358 00:15:12,545 --> 00:15:14,914 AND I THOUGHT MAYBE YOU'D LIKE TO JOIN ME. 359 00:15:14,982 --> 00:15:16,483 JOIN YOU. WHAT DO YOU SAY? 360 00:15:16,549 --> 00:15:19,152 IT'S NOT THAT I DON'T WANT TO MEET YOUR PARENTS. 361 00:15:19,219 --> 00:15:22,522 IT'S JUST THAT I HAVEN'T MET ANY PARENTS FOR A LONG TIME. 362 00:15:22,589 --> 00:15:24,224 WELL, YOU DON'T HAVE TO. 363 00:15:24,291 --> 00:15:26,126 I'M JUST GIVING YOU THE OPTION. 364 00:15:26,193 --> 00:15:27,827 JEEZ, MAN, JUST MEET HER PARENTS ALREADY. 365 00:15:27,894 --> 00:15:30,563 SO WHAT IF THEY HATE YOU? YOU'VE BEEN THERE BEFORE. 366 00:15:30,630 --> 00:15:32,799 I DIDN'T MEAN TO PUT YOU ON THE SPOT. 367 00:15:32,865 --> 00:15:37,004 I'M NOT ON THE SPOT. REALLY, I'M COMPLETELY OFF THE SPOT. 368 00:15:37,070 --> 00:15:38,671 I'M [CLEARS THROAT] SPOTLESS. 369 00:15:38,738 --> 00:15:42,009 UH, WHAT TIME'S THE LUNCH? 2:00 ON THURSDAY. 370 00:15:42,075 --> 00:15:44,911 OKAY, 2:00 ON THURSDAY, I'LL BE THERE. 371 00:15:44,978 --> 00:15:47,147 THAT'S GREAT. SO I'LL SEE YOU TONIGHT? 372 00:15:47,214 --> 00:15:48,681 I'LL SEE YOU TONIGHT. 373 00:15:50,583 --> 00:15:51,684 I HAVE TO GO. 374 00:15:51,751 --> 00:15:53,020 WHERE? SCHOOL. 375 00:15:53,086 --> 00:15:54,321 OH, SCHOOL. OKAY. 376 00:15:54,387 --> 00:15:57,424 WELL, HAVE A GOOD DAY AT SCHOOL. 377 00:15:57,490 --> 00:15:58,491 I WILL. 378 00:16:29,922 --> 00:16:32,392 [ ENGINE TURNS OVER ] 379 00:16:33,593 --> 00:16:35,428 [ TIRES SCREECHING ] 380 00:16:39,799 --> 00:16:41,168 MILLS COLLEGE. 381 00:16:41,234 --> 00:16:43,370 ISN'T THAT THE ONE WHERE ALL THOSE GIRLS CRIED 382 00:16:43,436 --> 00:16:45,238 BECAUSE THEY WERE GONNA LET BOYS IN? 383 00:16:45,305 --> 00:16:48,075 WHY ARE YOU GOING THERE? IT'S THE ONE THAT TOOK ME. 384 00:16:48,141 --> 00:16:49,909 WHY'D YOU APPLY? I NEEDED A FALL-BACK OPTION. 385 00:16:49,976 --> 00:16:52,812 WELL, FALL BACK RIGHT INTO SOME BIG MAMA'S LOVING ARMS. 386 00:16:52,879 --> 00:16:55,148 EW. DEPRESSING. DID YOU DECIDE? 387 00:16:55,215 --> 00:16:56,316 LAST NIGHT. 388 00:16:56,383 --> 00:16:57,484 BRANDEIS? TULANE. 389 00:16:57,550 --> 00:16:59,386 THE BIG EASY. ENOUGH SAID. 390 00:16:59,452 --> 00:17:02,289 OH, PARIS, HI. YOU'RE BACK. 391 00:17:02,355 --> 00:17:04,424 OH, MY GOD. WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR NOSE? 392 00:17:04,491 --> 00:17:06,859 YOU HAD IT DONE. I DID NOT HAVE IT DONE. 393 00:17:06,926 --> 00:17:09,996 DID YOU FALL? NO, I DIDN'T FALL. I HAD IT PIERCED. 394 00:17:10,063 --> 00:17:11,964 YOU WHAT? WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT? 395 00:17:12,031 --> 00:17:14,801 BECAUSE YOU TOLD ME TO GO OUT AND DO SOMETHING CRAZY. 396 00:17:14,867 --> 00:17:18,305 I MEANT HAVE SOME ICE CREAM, SEE THREE MOVIES, BUY A NEW PURSE. 397 00:17:18,371 --> 00:17:20,773 I DIDN'T MEAN POKE A THIRD HOLE IN YOUR NOSE. 398 00:17:20,840 --> 00:17:23,410 I DIDN'T BUY A NEW PURSE. I PIERCED MY NOSE. 399 00:17:23,476 --> 00:17:26,879 AND WITHIN AN HOUR MY NOSE SWELLED UP TO FOUR TIMES ITS NORMAL SIZE, 400 00:17:26,946 --> 00:17:29,116 BLOCKING ALL NASAL PASSAGES, MAKING IT IMPOSSIBLE TO BREATHE. 401 00:17:29,182 --> 00:17:32,985 I WENT TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM, WHERE THEY PRIED THE THING OUT OF MY NOSE. 402 00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:36,256 I SPENT THE NIGHT WITH AN ICE PACK STRAPPED TO MY FACE. 403 00:17:36,323 --> 00:17:38,958 IT SEEMS THAT I WAS ALLERGIC TO THE CRAP METAL HOOP 404 00:17:39,025 --> 00:17:43,029 THAT I PAID $19.95 TO HAVE JAMMED INTO MY NOSE. DID YOU TAKE A PICTURE? 405 00:17:43,096 --> 00:17:47,134 I WAS A LITTLE BUSY TRYING TO GET AIR TO MY BRAIN CELLS. 406 00:17:47,200 --> 00:17:51,138 PARIS, I'M SO SORRY. I DIDN'T -- 407 00:17:51,204 --> 00:17:53,473 HELLO? RORINO? GOOD. I CAUGHT YOU. 408 00:17:53,540 --> 00:17:57,544 THERE'S A BIT OF A DESIGN FLAW IN THE PIZZA HERE. WHAT KIND OF DESIGN FLAW? 409 00:17:57,610 --> 00:18:01,648 THE CRUST IS NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO SUPPORT ALL THE TOPPINGS WE TALKED ABOUT. 410 00:18:01,714 --> 00:18:04,717 WE MIGHT NEED TO PUT IN A SECOND CRUST. A SECOND CRUST? 411 00:18:04,784 --> 00:18:08,020 ABOUT 3/4 OF THE WAY IN -- SORT OF LIKE A RETAINING WALL. 412 00:18:08,087 --> 00:18:09,789 WHAT ABOUT JUST MAKING THE CRUST THICKER? 413 00:18:09,856 --> 00:18:11,524 OKAY, WE'RE BRAINSTORMING. I GOT IT. 414 00:18:11,591 --> 00:18:14,427 A THICKER CRUST -- THAT MIGHT DO IT. 415 00:18:14,494 --> 00:18:18,931 LET ME NOODLE AROUND WITH THAT FOR A WHILE AND GET BACK TO YOU. OKAY. BYE, PETE. 416 00:18:18,998 --> 00:18:23,670 I WILL NOT LET YOU LOOK AT MY NOSE FOR $10, YOU SICK JOB. BEAT IT! NOW! 417 00:18:23,736 --> 00:18:26,373 COME BACK WHEN YOU HAVE A $20. 418 00:18:26,439 --> 00:18:29,476 WHAT? JUST MAKING LEMONADE HERE. 419 00:18:31,911 --> 00:18:34,147 [ KNOCK ON DOOR ] 420 00:18:34,214 --> 00:18:35,882 I'M COMING. 421 00:18:40,753 --> 00:18:41,988 OHH. 422 00:18:42,054 --> 00:18:43,156 [ KNOCKING CONTINUES ] 423 00:18:43,223 --> 00:18:44,624 COMING! 424 00:18:46,759 --> 00:18:48,295 HIYA! 425 00:18:48,361 --> 00:18:50,397 YOUR SLAVE IS HERE. 426 00:18:50,463 --> 00:18:52,432 AND WHERE'S THE FRENCH-MAID OUTFIT I REQUESTED? 427 00:18:52,499 --> 00:18:54,334 I'VE GOT IT ON UNDER THE PLAID. 428 00:18:54,401 --> 00:18:55,602 WHAT ELSE IS NEW? 429 00:18:55,668 --> 00:18:57,870 SO HOW'S IT FEEL TO BE A YEAR OLDER? 430 00:18:57,937 --> 00:18:59,906 I'M NOT A YEAR OLDER UNTIL FRIDAY, FIFI. 431 00:18:59,972 --> 00:19:02,141 WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? MY BIRTHDAY MALLOMARS. 432 00:19:02,209 --> 00:19:04,211 SHE SAYS LIKE I SHOULD JUST KNOW THIS. 433 00:19:04,277 --> 00:19:05,712 HERE'S YOUR LIST. 434 00:19:05,778 --> 00:19:07,380 WHAT'S WRONG WITH THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL? 435 00:19:07,447 --> 00:19:08,981 IT'S NOT DISPOSING. 436 00:19:09,048 --> 00:19:13,486 NEXT. YOU'RE SO GOOD. 437 00:19:13,553 --> 00:19:14,821 YOU EVER CONSIDER THE POSSIBILITY 438 00:19:14,887 --> 00:19:16,889 OF JUST PULLING THE SPOON OUT YOURSELF? 439 00:19:16,956 --> 00:19:18,258 I DID CONSIDER IT, YES. 440 00:19:18,325 --> 00:19:20,327 DO YOU WANT TO START UPSTAIRS OR DOWN? 441 00:19:20,393 --> 00:19:22,595 'CAUSE THERE'S ACTUALLY MORE TO DO UPSTAIRS THIS TIME. 442 00:19:22,662 --> 00:19:25,932 WHAT DID YOU JUST DO? WHAT? 443 00:19:25,998 --> 00:19:29,602 YOU ATE THE COOKIE, AND THEN YOU TOOK A COOKIE OUT OF THE BOX 444 00:19:29,669 --> 00:19:32,239 AND PUT IT WHERE THE COOKIE YOU JUST ATE WAS. 445 00:19:32,305 --> 00:19:33,673 WELL, THAT'S NUTS. 446 00:19:33,740 --> 00:19:36,509 RORY MADE THIS FOR ME. I DON'T WANT TO RUIN IT. 447 00:19:36,576 --> 00:19:38,945 WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST EAT ONE OUT OF THE BOX? 448 00:19:39,011 --> 00:19:41,814 THIS ONE WAS RIGHT HERE. THE BOX WAS IN THE CUPBOARD. 449 00:19:41,881 --> 00:19:44,884 BUT YOU HAD TO GO TO THE CUPBOARD TO GET THE BOX 450 00:19:44,951 --> 00:19:47,320 TO REPLACE THE COOKIE YOU ATE OFF THE TABLE. 451 00:19:47,387 --> 00:19:49,989 [ CLEARS THROAT ] I'M LOOKING AT THE LIST NOW. 452 00:19:50,056 --> 00:19:53,793 OKAY, STAIRS, GUTTERS... 453 00:19:53,860 --> 00:19:56,095 ELECTRICAL OUTLET -- WHICH ONE? 454 00:19:56,162 --> 00:19:57,364 IN THE BATHROOM. 455 00:19:57,430 --> 00:19:59,566 BY THE SINK OR THE BATHTUB? BATHTUB. 456 00:19:59,632 --> 00:20:01,834 SO I CAN DO MOST OF THIS LIST TODAY, 457 00:20:01,901 --> 00:20:04,537 BUT I CAN'T PUT UP THE TOWEL RACK UNTIL LATER. 458 00:20:04,604 --> 00:20:06,005 I DIDN'T BRING MY DRILL. 459 00:20:06,072 --> 00:20:07,540 DIRTY, YES -- I KNOW. 460 00:20:07,607 --> 00:20:10,610 I'LL BE HERE TOMORROW AFTERNOON IF YOU WANT TO COME BY THEN. 461 00:20:10,677 --> 00:20:13,012 I CAN'T. I'M HAVING LUNCH WITH NICOLE'S PARENTS. 462 00:20:13,079 --> 00:20:14,947 REALLY? 463 00:20:15,014 --> 00:20:16,349 THEY'RE COMING INTO TOWN. 464 00:20:16,416 --> 00:20:19,118 SO NICOLE THOUGHT I SHOULD MEET THEM. 465 00:20:19,185 --> 00:20:20,420 MAKES SENSE. 466 00:20:20,487 --> 00:20:21,754 YEAH, WELL, YOU KNOW, 467 00:20:21,821 --> 00:20:24,023 WE'VE BEEN SEEING EACH OTHER FAIRLY REGULAR NOW, 468 00:20:24,090 --> 00:20:25,958 SO IT MAKES SENSE. 469 00:20:26,025 --> 00:20:27,294 YEAH, I THINK IT'S GREAT. 470 00:20:27,360 --> 00:20:29,662 YEAH, I DO, TOO. 471 00:20:29,729 --> 00:20:31,931 I SHOULD GET STARTED UPSTAIRS. 472 00:20:34,701 --> 00:20:36,869 BY THE WAY, YOU WERE RIGHT ABOUT JESS. 473 00:20:36,936 --> 00:20:39,105 WHAT ABOUT JESS? HE'S NOT GOING TO SCHOOL. 474 00:20:39,171 --> 00:20:40,473 ARE YOU SURE? 475 00:20:40,540 --> 00:20:42,475 I WATCHED HIM HEAD RIGHT TOWARD THE SCHOOL, 476 00:20:42,542 --> 00:20:46,746 AND WHEN HE THOUGHT NO ONE WAS WATCHING, HE GOT IN HIS CAR AND DROVE OFF. 477 00:20:46,813 --> 00:20:49,616 SO I GOT IN MY TRUCK AND FOLLOWED HIM. TO WAL-MART. 478 00:20:49,682 --> 00:20:51,584 HE'S BEEN LYING TO ME THIS WHOLE TIME. 479 00:20:51,651 --> 00:20:55,655 WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? I'M GONNA TELL HIM I KNOW WHAT HE'S BEEN DOING, 480 00:20:55,722 --> 00:20:58,691 REMIND HIM THAT HE'S SUPPOSED GRADUATE FROM SCHOOL. 481 00:20:58,758 --> 00:21:02,762 AND THEN...I'M GONNA TELL HIM I KNOW WHAT HE'S BEEN DOING. 482 00:21:02,829 --> 00:21:06,399 I'M SORRY, LUKE. WELL... I'M GONNA BE UPSTAIRS. 483 00:21:06,466 --> 00:21:08,601 OKAY. CALL IF YOU NEED ANYTHING. 484 00:21:16,576 --> 00:21:18,478 RORY! HEY, JACKSON. 485 00:21:18,545 --> 00:21:20,079 WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING? 486 00:21:20,146 --> 00:21:23,550 I'M TRYING TO TRANSPORT ALL THE SODAS FOR THE PARTY IN ONE TRIP, 487 00:21:23,616 --> 00:21:26,386 WHICH SEEMED SILLY WHEN I FIRST CAME UP WITH THE IDEA, 488 00:21:26,453 --> 00:21:28,054 AND IT'S RAPIDLY GROWING IN ITS STUPIDITY. 489 00:21:28,120 --> 00:21:31,090 I NEVER TOOK YOU FOR BEING THOUGHTLESS, BUT I WAS WRONG. 490 00:21:31,157 --> 00:21:33,393 WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 491 00:21:33,460 --> 00:21:35,362 YOU REALLY HURT SOOKIE, YOU KNOW THAT? 492 00:21:35,428 --> 00:21:36,629 WHY? WHAT DID I DO? 493 00:21:36,696 --> 00:21:39,699 WHAT DID YOU DO? HMM, LET ME SEE. 494 00:21:39,766 --> 00:21:40,967 WHAT DID YOU DO? 495 00:21:41,033 --> 00:21:43,002 UH, JACKSON, IF YOU COULD STOP MOVING AROUND -- 496 00:21:43,069 --> 00:21:45,638 I JUST HEARD THAT YOU'RE MAKING THE WORLD'S LARGEST PIZZA 497 00:21:45,705 --> 00:21:47,774 FOR LORELAI'S BIRTHDAY PARTY. 498 00:21:47,840 --> 00:21:48,941 YES. 499 00:21:49,008 --> 00:21:51,411 AND IT DOESN'T OCCUR TO YOU TO CONSULT SOOKIE? 500 00:21:51,478 --> 00:21:52,912 OH. OH, NO. 501 00:21:52,979 --> 00:21:55,748 THE WOMAN IS A GOURMET CHEF AND LORELAI'S BEST FRIEND, 502 00:21:55,815 --> 00:21:58,250 AND YOU DON'T INCLUDE HER IN THIS? 503 00:21:58,317 --> 00:21:59,619 BUT SOOKIE'S AN ARTIST. 504 00:21:59,686 --> 00:22:01,654 PIZZAS DIDN'T REALLY SEEM TO BE HER THING. 505 00:22:01,721 --> 00:22:03,055 EVERYTHING'S HER THING, YOUNG LADY. 506 00:22:03,122 --> 00:22:04,957 JACKSON, I WOULD NEVER PURPOSELY HURT SOOKIE. 507 00:22:05,024 --> 00:22:06,859 BESIDES, IT'S NOT THE WORLD'S LARGEST PIZZA. 508 00:22:06,926 --> 00:22:09,328 IT'S NOT EVEN THE TRICOUNTY AREA'S LARGEST PIZZA. 509 00:22:09,396 --> 00:22:12,965 I HAVE A SOBBING PREGNANT WOMAN AT HOME, WHICH IS NOT UNUSUAL, 510 00:22:13,032 --> 00:22:16,068 EXCEPT THIS TIME, I DIDN'T CAUSE IT. I'M SO, SO SORRY. 511 00:22:16,135 --> 00:22:18,738 AND BY THE WAY, THERE WOULDN'T HAPPEN TO BE VEGETABLES 512 00:22:18,805 --> 00:22:20,473 ON THAT PIZZA, WOULD THERE? 513 00:22:20,540 --> 00:22:23,309 BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW IF YOU GOT THE MEMO OR NOT, 514 00:22:23,376 --> 00:22:25,344 BUT I HAPPEN TO BE A PRODUCE MAN. 515 00:22:25,412 --> 00:22:27,213 AND A DARN GOOD ONE AT THAT. 516 00:22:27,279 --> 00:22:28,648 YET I DON'T REMEMBER A CALL 517 00:22:28,715 --> 00:22:30,683 ASKING ME TO HANDLE THE VEGETABLES. 518 00:22:30,750 --> 00:22:33,786 WAS THERE A CALL? DID I JUST MISS IT? WAS I OUT? 519 00:22:33,853 --> 00:22:36,623 WELL, YOU SEE, THE VEGGIES WERE INCLUDED IN THE PRICE. 520 00:22:36,689 --> 00:22:38,057 HMM! 521 00:22:38,124 --> 00:22:39,626 JACKSON, I'M SORRY! 522 00:22:39,692 --> 00:22:41,794 I HOPE YOU AND YOUR WORLD'S LARGEST PIZZA 523 00:22:41,861 --> 00:22:43,530 WILL BE VERY HAPPY TOGETHER. 524 00:22:43,596 --> 00:22:45,665 IT'S NOT THE LARGEST PIZZA IN THE WORLD. 525 00:22:45,732 --> 00:22:48,701 WE MAY BEAT WOODBRIDGE, BUT THAT'S IT, I SWEAR. 526 00:22:56,242 --> 00:22:57,810 SORRY, SORRY, SORRY. 527 00:22:57,877 --> 00:22:59,512 EVERYTHING OKAY? OH, YES. 528 00:22:59,579 --> 00:23:01,213 JUST HAD A FEW CALLS TO MAKE 529 00:23:01,280 --> 00:23:04,050 THAT TOOK UP A BIT MORE TIME THAN I HAD ANTICIPATED. 530 00:23:04,116 --> 00:23:07,119 HAVE YOU BEEN HERE LONG? 20 MINUTES AND 2 PIECES OF PIE. 531 00:23:07,186 --> 00:23:10,423 AMAZING. WELL, THEN, LET'S GET RIGHT DOWN TO IT, SHALL WE? 532 00:23:10,490 --> 00:23:12,258 CAN I GET YOU SOMETHING TO DRINK? 533 00:23:12,324 --> 00:23:13,392 ICE TEA, PLEASE. 534 00:23:13,460 --> 00:23:15,462 ANOTHER CUP OF COFFEE, LORELAI? 535 00:23:15,528 --> 00:23:17,263 SO, LORELAI. SO DAD. 536 00:23:17,329 --> 00:23:20,332 I APPRECIATE YOU TAKING THE TIME OUT TO MEET ME LIKE THIS. 537 00:23:20,399 --> 00:23:23,269 I APPRECIATE YOU ACTUALLY SHOWING UP AND NOT SENDING YOUR SECRETARY. 538 00:23:23,335 --> 00:23:26,205 I ASSUME YOU'RE WONDERING WHY I ASKED YOU HERE. 539 00:23:26,272 --> 00:23:27,474 NOT AT ALL. 540 00:23:27,540 --> 00:23:29,942 WELL, I HAVE SOMETHING FOR YOU. 541 00:23:30,009 --> 00:23:31,644 IS IT A HAT? NO. 542 00:23:31,711 --> 00:23:33,212 IS IT A PURSE? NO. 543 00:23:33,279 --> 00:23:34,481 LORELAI... 544 00:23:34,547 --> 00:23:35,882 GEORGE FOREMAN GRILL? 545 00:23:35,948 --> 00:23:38,017 WHEN YOU WERE BORN, I DECIDED TO CELEBRATE, 546 00:23:38,084 --> 00:23:40,286 SO AS SOON AS YOUR MOTHER WENT TO SLEEP, 547 00:23:40,352 --> 00:23:42,822 I LEFT THE HOSPITAL, I CALLED MY BUSINESS MANAGER, 548 00:23:42,889 --> 00:23:44,491 AND I MADE A REAL-ESTATE INVESTMENT. 549 00:23:44,557 --> 00:23:46,526 YOU DO KNOW HOW TO PARTY, DON'T YOU? 550 00:23:46,593 --> 00:23:48,394 I MADE THIS INVESTMENT IN YOUR NAME. 551 00:23:48,461 --> 00:23:50,497 WOW. MOST PEOPLE JUST BUY A STUFFED BEAR. 552 00:23:50,563 --> 00:23:52,064 THIS IS BETTER. 553 00:23:52,131 --> 00:23:55,134 ANYHOW, A LITTLE WHILE AGO, I GOT A LETTER FROM A LAWYER 554 00:23:55,201 --> 00:23:57,003 WHO WAS REPRESENTING THE INVESTMENT GROUP, 555 00:23:57,069 --> 00:23:59,271 INFORMING ME THAT THE GOVERNMENT IS BUILDING A ROAD 556 00:23:59,338 --> 00:24:01,440 RIGHT THROUGH THE MIDDLE OF YOUR INVESTMENT. 557 00:24:01,508 --> 00:24:02,742 HOW SAD. 558 00:24:02,809 --> 00:24:04,844 WHICH MEANS THAT THE COMPLEX HAS BEEN SOLD 559 00:24:04,911 --> 00:24:07,446 AND ALL THE INVESTORS WILL BE RECEIVING A CHECK. 560 00:24:07,514 --> 00:24:08,715 HAPPY. 561 00:24:08,781 --> 00:24:10,717 SINCE YOU ARE ONE OF THE INVESTORS... 562 00:24:10,783 --> 00:24:12,952 I GET A CHECK? YOU GET A CHECK. 563 00:24:13,019 --> 00:24:14,721 WOW! THAT'S... 564 00:24:18,057 --> 00:24:19,391 $75,000? 565 00:24:19,458 --> 00:24:22,962 YES, IT IS. I GET $75,000 FOR BEING BORN? 566 00:24:23,029 --> 00:24:25,231 I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE A PLEASANT SURPRISE. 567 00:24:25,297 --> 00:24:28,000 THIS IS $75,000. $75-- 568 00:24:28,067 --> 00:24:29,468 DO YOU HAVE A PEN? 569 00:24:29,536 --> 00:24:31,303 WHY, YES, I DO. 570 00:24:31,370 --> 00:24:33,439 $75,000, $75,000. 571 00:24:33,506 --> 00:24:35,207 OH, MY GOD. 572 00:24:35,274 --> 00:24:38,410 THAT'S, LIKE, 150 PAIRS OF JIMMY CHOOS. 573 00:24:38,477 --> 00:24:40,179 WHAT ARE JIMMY CHOOS? SHOES. 574 00:24:40,246 --> 00:24:41,714 150 PAIRS? THAT'S IT? 575 00:24:41,781 --> 00:24:43,482 DAD, THEY'RE JIMMY CHOOS. 576 00:24:43,550 --> 00:24:45,718 FOR $75,000, YOU SHOULD BE ABLE TO BUY 577 00:24:45,785 --> 00:24:47,954 AT LEAST 300 OR 400 PAIRS OF SHOES. 578 00:24:48,020 --> 00:24:49,789 NOT JIMMY CHOOS. THAT'S RIDICULOUS. 579 00:24:49,856 --> 00:24:52,659 YOU ARE NOT GOING TO SPEND $75,000 ON JIMMY CHOOS 580 00:24:52,725 --> 00:24:55,461 WHEN YOU COULD BUY 400 PAIRS OF LESS PRESTIGIOUS -- 581 00:24:55,528 --> 00:24:58,097 BUT I AM SURE -- EQUALLY STYLISH SHOES. 582 00:24:58,164 --> 00:25:00,166 YOU WILL SHOP AROUND FIRST. IS THAT CLEAR? 583 00:25:00,232 --> 00:25:02,434 YES, SIR. ALRIGHT, THEN IT'S SETTLED. 584 00:25:02,501 --> 00:25:04,871 LISTEN, DAD, THIS MONEY ISN'T, UH... 585 00:25:04,937 --> 00:25:07,239 IT ISN'T SOME KIND OF GIFT, IS IT? 586 00:25:07,306 --> 00:25:08,841 GIFT? LIKE A BIRTHDAY GIFT. 587 00:25:08,908 --> 00:25:11,477 BECAUSE IF IT IS, IT'S TOO MUCH, AND I CAN'T. 588 00:25:11,544 --> 00:25:13,646 I MADE THIS INVESTMENT IN YOUR NAME. 589 00:25:13,713 --> 00:25:15,715 YOU RECEIVED A CHECK. 590 00:25:15,782 --> 00:25:18,517 LEGALLY, I'M OBLIGATED TO GIVE YOU THAT. 591 00:25:18,585 --> 00:25:20,452 THIS ISN'T CHARITY OR GENEROSITY. 592 00:25:20,519 --> 00:25:21,788 IT IS THE LAW. 593 00:25:21,854 --> 00:25:25,457 IT'S THE LAW THAT I GET TO KEEP $75,000. 594 00:25:25,524 --> 00:25:27,059 ENJOY THE SHOES. 595 00:25:30,362 --> 00:25:31,397 WE COULD BUY A BOAT. 596 00:25:31,463 --> 00:25:32,765 WE COULD, BUT WHY? 597 00:25:32,832 --> 00:25:34,867 BECAUSE RICH PEOPLE ALWAYS HAVE A BOAT. 598 00:25:34,934 --> 00:25:36,969 WE COULD PARK IT IN THE FRONT YARD. 599 00:25:37,036 --> 00:25:38,437 YEAH, LIKE WHITE-TRASH RICH PEOPLE. 600 00:25:38,504 --> 00:25:40,807 GOD, THIS IS AMAZING. NO MORE CLIPPING COUPONS. 601 00:25:40,873 --> 00:25:43,109 NO MORE PICKING LOOSE CHANGE UP OFF THE GROUND, 602 00:25:43,175 --> 00:25:45,444 NO MORE DRIVING AROUND LOOKING FOR CHEAP GAS. 603 00:25:45,511 --> 00:25:47,246 WHICH TOTALLY DEFEATS THE PURPOSE, 604 00:25:47,313 --> 00:25:50,549 SINCE YOU WIND UP USING MORE GAS LOOKING FOR THE CHEAP GAS. 605 00:25:50,617 --> 00:25:51,918 $75,000. 606 00:25:51,984 --> 00:25:54,987 I FEEL SO RICH...AND SUDDENLY IN COMPLETE AGREEMENT 607 00:25:55,054 --> 00:25:57,289 WITH EVERYTHING BUSH HAS TO SAY. 608 00:25:57,356 --> 00:25:58,490 I'LL GET IT. 609 00:25:58,557 --> 00:26:00,059 NO! MORE SECRET BIRTHDAY CALLS. 610 00:26:00,126 --> 00:26:03,095 NOT EVERYTHING IS ABOUT YOU. IT COULD BE JESS. 611 00:26:03,162 --> 00:26:04,096 IT'S ABOUT ME. 612 00:26:04,163 --> 00:26:05,932 IT COULD BE LANE. IT'S ABOUT ME. 613 00:26:05,998 --> 00:26:07,967 IT COULD BE PARIS. IT COULD BE MADELINE. 614 00:26:08,034 --> 00:26:10,002 IT COULD BE A MYRIAD OF OTHER PEOPLE 615 00:26:10,069 --> 00:26:12,404 WANTING ONLY TO TALK TO ME ABOUT ME. 616 00:26:12,471 --> 00:26:14,741 IT'S ABOUT ME. 617 00:26:14,807 --> 00:26:17,343 HELLO? RORY, WE GOT A BIG PROBLEMO. 618 00:26:17,409 --> 00:26:18,678 WHAT'S THE MATTER, PETE? 619 00:26:18,745 --> 00:26:20,847 WE DID A TRIAL RUN OF THE PIZZA. 620 00:26:20,913 --> 00:26:23,282 JUST WANT TO MAKE SURE EVERYTHING WAS RIGHT THERE 621 00:26:23,349 --> 00:26:24,717 FOR THE BIG DAY, YOU KNOW? 622 00:26:24,784 --> 00:26:26,218 SO WE MADE A TRIAL PIZZA, 623 00:26:26,285 --> 00:26:29,055 AND KIRK BUILT A PIZZA RACK ON TOP OF HIS CAR. 624 00:26:29,121 --> 00:26:30,990 YOU WITH ME? LIKE A BAD HABIT. 625 00:26:31,057 --> 00:26:33,225 SO AS KIRK'S PUTTING THE PIZZA ON THE RACK, 626 00:26:33,292 --> 00:26:34,994 THE THING COLLAPSES, THE PIZZA SLIPS. 627 00:26:35,061 --> 00:26:37,830 LONG STORY SHORT -- KIRK HAS GOT SOME SEVERE CHEESE BURNS. 628 00:26:37,897 --> 00:26:39,799 OH, MY GOD. IS HE ALRIGHT? 629 00:26:39,866 --> 00:26:41,400 OH! WHO KNOWS? 630 00:26:41,467 --> 00:26:44,804 THE POINT IS I THINK THE PIZZA NEEDS TO BE CHEESELESS 631 00:26:44,871 --> 00:26:46,939 AND POSSIBLY SAUCELESS. 632 00:26:47,006 --> 00:26:49,041 THE THING'S A HAZARD, BABE. 633 00:26:49,108 --> 00:26:52,511 DID IT OCCUR TO YOU THAT THE PROBLEM MAY NOT BE THE PIZZA. 634 00:26:52,578 --> 00:26:54,446 IT MAY BE KIRK. NO. 635 00:26:54,513 --> 00:26:55,782 WELL, IT SHOULD HAVE. 636 00:26:55,848 --> 00:26:57,850 THE PIZZA HAS TO HAVE CHEESE AND SAUCE. 637 00:26:57,917 --> 00:26:59,485 OTHERWISE, IT'S NOT A PIZZA. IT'S BREAD. 638 00:26:59,551 --> 00:27:02,121 IF YOU'RE GONNA INSIST ON THE CHEESE AND THE SAUCE, 639 00:27:02,188 --> 00:27:04,623 YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO PROVIDE THE TRANSPORTATION YOURSELF. 640 00:27:04,691 --> 00:27:06,492 FINE, PETE. I WILL FIGURE SOMETHING OUT. 641 00:27:06,558 --> 00:27:08,060 ROGER, WILCO, SENORITA. 642 00:27:08,127 --> 00:27:10,296 WHO WAS IT? 643 00:27:10,362 --> 00:27:11,563 ASTRID FROM SCHOOL. 644 00:27:11,630 --> 00:27:13,232 SHE'S LEAVING FOR EUROPE FOR A WEEK, 645 00:27:13,299 --> 00:27:16,302 AND SHE WANTS ME TO TAKE NOTES AND E-MAIL HER EVERYTHING. 646 00:27:16,368 --> 00:27:18,037 IT WAS ABOUT ME. 647 00:27:21,941 --> 00:27:24,110 HEY. HEY, YOU'RE HOME LATE. 648 00:27:24,176 --> 00:27:25,144 TRAFFIC. 649 00:27:25,211 --> 00:27:28,014 YOU HUNGRY? I'M MEETING RORY. 650 00:27:28,080 --> 00:27:29,849 WANT ME TO MAKE YOU SOME SANDWICHES? 651 00:27:29,916 --> 00:27:33,119 SO WE CAN BROWN-BAG IT ON OUR DATE? I DON'T THINK SO. 652 00:27:33,185 --> 00:27:34,320 HOW WAS WORK? 653 00:27:34,386 --> 00:27:36,188 THE CLEANED-UP VERSION OF "THE EMINEM SHOW" 654 00:27:36,255 --> 00:27:37,824 SEEMS TO BE SELLING PRETTY WELL, 655 00:27:37,890 --> 00:27:40,059 SO THE WORLD IS BASICALLY COMING TO AN END. 656 00:27:40,126 --> 00:27:42,695 SO, LISTEN, I WANT TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT SOMETHING. 657 00:27:42,762 --> 00:27:44,196 TALK. 658 00:27:44,263 --> 00:27:46,699 COULD YOU STOP GROOMING FOR JUST A SECOND, PLEASE? 659 00:27:46,766 --> 00:27:48,167 I'M ALREADY LATE. 660 00:27:48,234 --> 00:27:50,602 I WAS DOING SOME THINKING ABOUT YOUR SITUATION. 661 00:27:50,669 --> 00:27:52,238 MY SITUATION? 662 00:27:52,304 --> 00:27:54,673 YOU KNOW, YOU'RE WORKING HERE, YOU'RE WORKING AT WAL-MART, 663 00:27:54,741 --> 00:27:57,476 IT JUST SEEMS LIKE A LOT. 664 00:27:57,543 --> 00:28:00,512 YOU EVER WORRY THAT IF A BIRD FLIES INTO YOUR HEAD, 665 00:28:00,579 --> 00:28:02,114 IT MIGHT NEVER GET OUT AGAIN? 666 00:28:02,181 --> 00:28:06,318 I JUST THOUGHT MAYBE I COULD MAKE THINGS A LITTLE EASIER. 667 00:28:06,385 --> 00:28:08,020 HOW? 668 00:28:08,087 --> 00:28:10,890 WELL, I COULD, UH, GIVE YOU A RAISE AT THE DINER. 669 00:28:10,957 --> 00:28:13,025 AND MAYBE HELP OUT 670 00:28:13,092 --> 00:28:15,627 WITH SOME OF THE, YOU KNOW, BIGGER MONEY BURDENS, 671 00:28:15,694 --> 00:28:16,929 LIKE YOUR CAR INSURANCE. 672 00:28:16,996 --> 00:28:18,564 WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO DO THAT? 673 00:28:18,630 --> 00:28:21,200 SO YOU CAN QUIT YOUR JOB AT WAL-MART. NO WAY. 674 00:28:21,267 --> 00:28:23,502 BUT YOU'D STILL BE MAKING MONEY, AND THIS WAY, 675 00:28:23,569 --> 00:28:27,373 YOU GET TO SPEND MORE TIME ON RORY...AND SCHOOL. 676 00:28:27,439 --> 00:28:28,640 I'M FINE. 677 00:28:28,707 --> 00:28:30,943 JESS, COME ON. TAKE THE DEAL. 678 00:28:31,010 --> 00:28:32,678 I HAVE TO CHANGE. 679 00:28:32,745 --> 00:28:34,413 I KNOW YOU'RE NOT GOING TO SCHOOL. 680 00:28:34,480 --> 00:28:37,049 I SAW YOU GET IN YOUR CAR AND DRIVE OFF. 681 00:28:37,116 --> 00:28:39,085 YOU'RE SPYING ON ME? YOU LIED TO ME. 682 00:28:39,151 --> 00:28:41,520 ONCE IN A WHILE, I TAKE AN EXTRA SHIFT. 683 00:28:41,587 --> 00:28:43,455 I GO ENOUGH. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? 684 00:28:43,522 --> 00:28:44,891 IT'S PUBLIC SCHOOL. 685 00:28:44,957 --> 00:28:46,959 MY HISTORY TEACHER IS ALSO THE FOOTBALL COACH. 686 00:28:47,026 --> 00:28:50,329 JESS, WE HAD A DEAL. YOU GO TO SCHOOL, YOU GRADUATE. 687 00:28:50,396 --> 00:28:51,898 I KNOW. RELAX. 688 00:28:51,964 --> 00:28:53,665 I GOT IT ALL UNDER CONTROL. 689 00:28:53,732 --> 00:28:56,202 I HAVE TO CHANGE. 690 00:28:56,268 --> 00:28:57,403 JESS! 691 00:28:59,872 --> 00:29:02,108 THAT'S RIGHT. BREAKFAST IS INCLUDED. 692 00:29:02,174 --> 00:29:05,177 THEN AT 5:00, WE INVITE ALL THE GUESTS TO THE LOBBY 693 00:29:05,244 --> 00:29:07,246 FOR COMPLIMENTARY WINE AND CHEESE AND MINGLING. 694 00:29:07,313 --> 00:29:10,549 YES, IT IS KIND OF LIKE A B and B. 695 00:29:10,616 --> 00:29:14,653 OKAY, GREAT. WE'LL SEE YOU AND SWEETIE THEN. 696 00:29:14,720 --> 00:29:16,222 BYE. 697 00:29:16,288 --> 00:29:20,359 SO, AS YOU KNOW, WE HAVE TO GET THIS PLACE UP AND RUNNING 698 00:29:20,426 --> 00:29:23,562 AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE FOR AS LITTLE MONEY AS POSSIBLE. 699 00:29:23,629 --> 00:29:27,166 SO LAST NIGHT I PULLED OUT THE OLD "TIME-LIFE" SERIES, 700 00:29:27,233 --> 00:29:30,369 AND I HAVE TO ADMIT THERE'S SOME PRETTY TERRIFIC IDEAS IN HERE. 701 00:29:30,436 --> 00:29:34,140 FOR EXAMPLE, WE CAN PUTTY UP THE CRACKS IN THE DRYWALL 702 00:29:34,206 --> 00:29:37,810 AND THEN GIVE THE LOWER PART OF THE WALL A GOOD COAT OF PAINT. 703 00:29:37,877 --> 00:29:39,711 THEN WE CAN TAKE A STRIP OF WALLPAPER, 704 00:29:39,778 --> 00:29:43,382 PUT IT AROUND THE TOP, THUS CREATING SORT OF A BORDER, IF YOU WILL. 705 00:29:43,449 --> 00:29:46,552 I GATHERED UP ALL THE BROKEN CHINA FROM THE DINING ROOM, 706 00:29:46,618 --> 00:29:48,020 BECAUSE I READ HERE IN MARTHA 707 00:29:48,087 --> 00:29:50,256 THAT CHIPPED TEA CUPS MAKE GREAT VOTIVE HOLDERS. 708 00:29:50,322 --> 00:29:52,124 AND WE ALL KNOW WHEN IN DOUBT, 709 00:29:52,191 --> 00:29:54,093 IT'S CANDLES, CANDLES, CANDLES, RIGHT? 710 00:29:54,160 --> 00:29:57,063 SO I CLEANED THEM UP, FILLED THEM WITH TEA LIGHTS, 711 00:29:57,129 --> 00:29:58,831 AND I THINK THEY LOOK TERRIFIC. 712 00:29:58,898 --> 00:30:01,500 OH, THE PIECES THAT WERE TOO FAR GONE TO SAVE -- 713 00:30:01,567 --> 00:30:02,969 I JUST SMASHED THEM UP 714 00:30:03,035 --> 00:30:06,038 AND USED THE PIECES TO MAKE THIS NICE PICTURE FRAME. 715 00:30:06,105 --> 00:30:08,340 THAT'S A GREAT IDEA, TOBIN, REALLY. 716 00:30:08,407 --> 00:30:12,211 UH, LORELAI, I HAVE A LITTLE SOMETHING FOR YOU. 717 00:30:12,278 --> 00:30:13,412 FOR ME? 718 00:30:13,479 --> 00:30:16,082 YES. I WASN'T SURE IT WOULD GET HERE IN TIME 719 00:30:16,148 --> 00:30:17,884 SINCE I ORDERED IT FROM MADRID, 720 00:30:17,950 --> 00:30:19,919 BUT THANK GOD IT MADE IT. 721 00:30:19,986 --> 00:30:22,121 HAPPY BIRTHDAY. 722 00:30:22,188 --> 00:30:24,356 YOU BOUGHT ME A PRESENT? YES. 723 00:30:24,423 --> 00:30:26,825 YOU'VE NEVER BOUGHT ME A PRESENT. I HAVE, TOO. 724 00:30:26,893 --> 00:30:28,560 NOT ONCE IN FIVE YEARS. 725 00:30:28,627 --> 00:30:30,829 JUST OPEN UP THE BAG, PLEASE. 726 00:30:34,033 --> 00:30:35,634 MICHEL, IT'S BEAUTIFUL. 727 00:30:35,701 --> 00:30:39,338 YES, WELL, I WANTED IT TO BE SPECIAL, YOU KNOW, 728 00:30:39,405 --> 00:30:41,607 NOT JUST SOME KNICKKNACK YOU COULD PICK UP 729 00:30:41,673 --> 00:30:44,676 AT A SUPERMARKET OR A CAR WASH. 730 00:30:44,743 --> 00:30:46,445 WELL, IT'S GREAT. I LOVE IT. 731 00:30:46,512 --> 00:30:48,780 I MUST SAY, I FEEL VERY SPOILED -- 732 00:30:48,847 --> 00:30:51,417 BEAUTIFUL DAYBOOK, CAPPUCCINO CANDLE. 733 00:30:51,483 --> 00:30:53,886 OH, THAT REMINDS ME. I GOT YOU SOMETHING ELSE. 734 00:30:53,953 --> 00:30:55,787 TOBIN, YOU ALREADY GAVE ME A GIFT. 735 00:30:55,854 --> 00:30:57,223 THAT WAS A PREGIFT. 736 00:30:57,289 --> 00:31:00,927 WHY DON'T YOU SCOOCH JUST A LITTLE BIT FOR ME? 737 00:31:00,993 --> 00:31:02,628 TOBIN, THIS IS TOO MUCH. 738 00:31:02,694 --> 00:31:06,198 YES, IT IS, BUT I SAW IT, AND IT JUST SCREAMED "LORELAI." 739 00:31:06,265 --> 00:31:08,000 OKAY, WELL... [ GIGGLES ] 740 00:31:08,067 --> 00:31:10,669 GOD, THIS IS EXCITING. I LOVE MY BIRTHDAY. 741 00:31:10,736 --> 00:31:11,837 I HOPE IT FITS. 742 00:31:11,904 --> 00:31:13,005 FITS? 743 00:31:13,072 --> 00:31:14,340 TOBIN, THIS IS AMAZING. 744 00:31:14,406 --> 00:31:16,375 THAT IS THE JACKET THAT JOE STRUMMER WORE 745 00:31:16,442 --> 00:31:19,378 DURING THE 1979 PEARL HARBOR TOUR. 746 00:31:19,445 --> 00:31:20,679 NO! YES. 747 00:31:20,746 --> 00:31:22,148 WHO IS JOE STRUMMER? 748 00:31:22,214 --> 00:31:24,816 TELL ME YOU'RE KIDDING. YOU DID NOT GET ME THIS. 749 00:31:24,883 --> 00:31:26,352 IS HE A HELL'S ANGEL MAN? 750 00:31:26,418 --> 00:31:28,054 JOE STRUMMER IS FROM THE CLASH. 751 00:31:28,120 --> 00:31:29,288 THE CLASH IS A BAND. 752 00:31:29,355 --> 00:31:31,723 AND A BAND IS -- I KNOW WHAT A BAND IS. 753 00:31:31,790 --> 00:31:36,028 AND RORY AND LANE HAVE BEEN IN MOURNING FOR MONTHS, AND NOW I HAVE HIS JACKET. 754 00:31:36,095 --> 00:31:39,465 THIS IS BY FAR THE COOLEST THING I HAVE EVER GOTTEN. 755 00:31:39,531 --> 00:31:43,335 GOD! OH, SMELL IT. IT SMELLS LIKE JOE. 756 00:31:43,402 --> 00:31:46,505 WELL, THIS IS WONDERFUL -- TO SMELL LIKE A DEAD GUY. 757 00:31:46,572 --> 00:31:48,774 YOU'LL HAVE TO BEAT THEM OFF WITH A STICK. 758 00:31:48,840 --> 00:31:51,243 AND THERE'S A LETTER OF AUTHENTICITY IN THE BAG 759 00:31:51,310 --> 00:31:53,279 AND A PICTURE OF JOE WEARING THE JACKET, 760 00:31:53,345 --> 00:31:56,748 AND ALSO, THEY THREW IN A BERET JUST FOR THE HECK OF IT. 761 00:31:56,815 --> 00:31:58,250 TOBIN, YOU ARE GETTING A HUG. 762 00:31:58,317 --> 00:32:00,752 WELL, I'D FIGHT IT, BUT WHAT'S THE POINT, RIGHT? 763 00:32:00,819 --> 00:32:03,155 I HAVE TO RUN AN ERRAND. 764 00:32:03,222 --> 00:32:04,290 WHERE ARE YOU GOING? 765 00:32:04,356 --> 00:32:06,625 JUST BE HERE WHEN I GET BACK. 766 00:32:11,998 --> 00:32:13,632 NICOLE, YOU'RE -- I AM NOT BEING STUBBORN. 767 00:32:13,699 --> 00:32:15,867 YOU DIDN'T LET ME GET THE "STUBBORN" OUT. 768 00:32:15,934 --> 00:32:17,336 LUKE, WOULD YOU LIKE A BLINI? 769 00:32:17,403 --> 00:32:19,571 WHEN YOU SIGN UP TO BECOME A SURROGATE MOTHER, 770 00:32:19,638 --> 00:32:21,207 YOU ENTER INTO A BUSINESS AGREEMENT, 771 00:32:21,273 --> 00:32:23,242 AND THE RULES OF BUSINESS SHOULD APPLY. 772 00:32:23,309 --> 00:32:25,177 YOU AS A LAWYER SHOULD UNDERSTAND THAT. 773 00:32:25,244 --> 00:32:27,013 AS A LAWYER, I DO UNDERSTAND THAT. 774 00:32:27,079 --> 00:32:28,714 AS A HUMAN BEING, I ALSO UNDERSTAND 775 00:32:28,780 --> 00:32:31,550 THAT WHEN A WOMAN'S ALONE AND IN NEED OF MONEY 776 00:32:31,617 --> 00:32:33,819 SHE CAN DO THINGS THAT SHE'LL LATER REGRET. 777 00:32:33,885 --> 00:32:35,287 I COULD GET YOU SOME CHEESE. 778 00:32:35,354 --> 00:32:38,157 YOU CANNOT FORCE A MOTHER TO GIVE UP HER CHILD. 779 00:32:38,224 --> 00:32:40,592 IF SHE SIGNED A PAPER SAYING, "ON APRIL THE 12th, 780 00:32:40,659 --> 00:32:43,662 I AM GIVING BIRTH, AND WHATEVER COMES OUT, I'M HANDING TO YOU," 781 00:32:43,729 --> 00:32:46,098 AND YOU PAY HER MONEY AND HER MEDICAL EXPENSES -- 782 00:32:46,165 --> 00:32:48,400 THEY PICK A SUBJECT, AND THEY ARGUE UNTIL DINNER. 783 00:32:48,467 --> 00:32:51,703 THEN THEY CALL A TRUCE, AND THEY PICK IT BACK UP FOR DESSERT. 784 00:32:51,770 --> 00:32:54,306 ENOUGH. I DON'T WANT TO ARGUE WITH YOU ANYMORE. 785 00:32:54,373 --> 00:32:56,208 WHAT CAN I DO WITH HER, LUKE? 786 00:32:56,275 --> 00:32:59,045 WELL, UH, PROBABLY NOT MUCH. 787 00:32:59,111 --> 00:33:01,280 SO, LUKE, I FEEL LIKE WE'VE BEEN IGNORING YOU. 788 00:33:01,347 --> 00:33:03,449 NICOLE TOLD US YOU'VE NEVER BEEN MARRIED. 789 00:33:03,515 --> 00:33:06,318 OR WE COULD TALK ABOUT HOW HE OWNS HIS OWN DINER. 790 00:33:06,385 --> 00:33:10,256 YOU JUST SIT THERE AND PRETEND TO BE ASHAMED OF US. 791 00:33:10,322 --> 00:33:12,324 UH, NO, I HAVE NEVER BEEN MARRIED. 792 00:33:12,391 --> 00:33:14,693 BUT SOMEDAY MAYBE, RIGHT? 793 00:33:14,760 --> 00:33:16,695 MARRIAGE, CHILDREN? 794 00:33:16,762 --> 00:33:19,465 SHE MEANS EVENTUALLY AND WITH THE WOMAN OF YOUR CHOICE. 795 00:33:19,531 --> 00:33:21,500 THEY WILL NOT BE INVOLVED IN THE PICKING. 796 00:33:21,567 --> 00:33:23,602 BECAUSE THERE IS NOTHING MORE WONDERFUL THAN MARRIAGE. 797 00:33:23,669 --> 00:33:25,637 THE OTHERS ESCAPED OUT THE BATHROOM WINDOW. 798 00:33:25,704 --> 00:33:29,475 WELL, THERE'S NOTHING MORE REWARDING THAN CHILDREN. 799 00:33:29,541 --> 00:33:31,577 YOU JUST CAN'T IMAGINE UNTIL YOU'VE BEEN THERE. 800 00:33:31,643 --> 00:33:34,246 AND THIS ONE HERE MADE EVERYTHING IN LIFE WORTH IT. 801 00:33:34,313 --> 00:33:35,814 THE WHOLE EXPERIENCE IS LIKE 802 00:33:35,881 --> 00:33:37,949 THE MOST FABULOUS ROLLER-COASTER RIDE YOU CAN IMAGINE. 803 00:33:38,016 --> 00:33:42,121 FROM THE TIME THEY'RE BORN TO THAT FIRST STEP, THE FIRST WORD, 804 00:33:42,188 --> 00:33:44,190 THE FIRST TIME THEY HUG YOU, 805 00:33:44,256 --> 00:33:46,425 THE FIRST TIME THEY PICK OUT THEIR OWN OUTFITS. 806 00:33:46,492 --> 00:33:48,860 THE FIRST TIME THEY TELL YOU THEY'RE GOING TO SCHOOL, 807 00:33:48,927 --> 00:33:51,497 AND THEY GET IN THEIR CAR AND DRIVE TO WAL-MART. 808 00:33:51,563 --> 00:33:55,434 THEY THINK YOU'RE JUST A MORON, AND THEY DON'T THINK 809 00:33:55,501 --> 00:33:59,538 THAT MAYBE YOU KNOW THAT THEY'RE LYING TO YOUR FACE 810 00:33:59,605 --> 00:34:02,274 AND THAT YOU'RE REALLY MAD BECAUSE YOU GUYS HAD AGREEMENT. 811 00:34:02,341 --> 00:34:04,676 OH, DEAR. THAT AGREEMENT WAS CLEAR, VERY CLEAR. 812 00:34:04,743 --> 00:34:06,545 AND THEY KNOW THAT BREAKING THAT AGREEMENT 813 00:34:06,612 --> 00:34:08,814 IS A VIOLATION OF EVERYTHING YOU HAD TALKED ABOUT. 814 00:34:08,880 --> 00:34:11,049 OH, YEAH, THAT IS CUTE. THAT'S JUST DARLING. 815 00:34:11,117 --> 00:34:13,319 I CAN'T WAIT TO EXPERIENCE THAT AGAIN. 816 00:34:16,422 --> 00:34:20,359 I'M SORRY. DID SOMEONE MENTION CHEESE? 817 00:34:29,601 --> 00:34:30,936 HEY, GUYS. 818 00:34:31,002 --> 00:34:34,039 RORY, JUST THE LADY WE'RE LOOKING FOR, WE HAVE A PLAN. 819 00:34:34,106 --> 00:34:35,774 GOOD, 'CAUSE I'VE GOT A CHECK. 820 00:34:35,841 --> 00:34:38,009 WE'VE SOLVED THE PROBLEM OF TRANSPORTING THE BIG PIZZA. 821 00:34:38,076 --> 00:34:40,912 I WAS OF LITTLE HELP SINCE I'M CURRENTLY IN EXCRUCIATING PAIN. 822 00:34:40,979 --> 00:34:43,682 INSTEAD OF THIS WHOLE ONE HUGE PIZZA CONCEPT, 823 00:34:43,749 --> 00:34:46,952 WE'RE GONNA DO 100 LITTLE PIZZAS ALL SITTING NEXT TO EACH OTHER. 824 00:34:47,018 --> 00:34:48,187 WHAT? LIKE A PIZZA DOILY. 825 00:34:48,254 --> 00:34:49,988 I DON'T WANT A PIZZA DOILY. 826 00:34:50,055 --> 00:34:51,290 MORE OF A COLLAGE. 827 00:34:51,357 --> 00:34:53,792 I DON'T WANT A PIZZA COLLAGE EITHER. 828 00:34:53,859 --> 00:34:55,661 HOW 'BOUT WE PUT THE PIZZAS TOGETHER 829 00:34:55,727 --> 00:34:57,696 AND THEN PUT PEPPERONIS OVER THE OPEN SPOTS? 830 00:34:57,763 --> 00:34:59,731 SO IT LOOKS LIKE ONE BIG PIZZA. TRICKY. 831 00:34:59,798 --> 00:35:02,000 OR WE COULD PUT CHEESE OVER THE HOLES. 832 00:35:02,067 --> 00:35:03,502 DON'T SAY THE "C" WORD. 833 00:35:03,569 --> 00:35:05,171 CHEESE MIGHT FALL THROUGH THE HOLES. 834 00:35:05,237 --> 00:35:06,872 WE CAN USE SLICES. THAT'LL WORK. 835 00:35:06,938 --> 00:35:08,574 THAT WILL NOT WORK. 836 00:35:08,640 --> 00:35:10,442 NOW, YOU THREE LISTEN TO ME. 837 00:35:10,509 --> 00:35:13,512 WE AGREED THAT THIS WAS GOING TO BE THE WORLD'S LARGEST PIZZA. 838 00:35:13,579 --> 00:35:16,148 NOW, I REALIZE IT CAN BE THE WORLD'S LARGEST PIZZA 839 00:35:16,215 --> 00:35:17,549 BECAUSE THAT PIZZA WAS INSANE, 840 00:35:17,616 --> 00:35:20,452 BUT IT IS STILL GOING TO BE CRAZY LARGE. 841 00:35:20,519 --> 00:35:21,920 BUT WE -- NO BUTS! 842 00:35:21,987 --> 00:35:24,390 THAT WAS THE CONCEPT. GET BACK TO THE CONCEPT. 843 00:35:24,456 --> 00:35:27,025 THIS IS NOT "GANGS OF NEW YORK" NOW WITH CAMERON DIAZ. 844 00:35:27,092 --> 00:35:30,296 THIS IS "GANGS OF NEW YORK" 20 YEARS AGO WITH MERYL STREEP. 845 00:35:30,362 --> 00:35:33,832 COME BACK, REFOCUS. REMEMBER THE GOAL. 846 00:35:33,899 --> 00:35:35,701 AM I MAKING MYSELF CLEAR? 847 00:35:35,767 --> 00:35:37,836 CAMERON DIAZ IS HOT. 848 00:35:37,903 --> 00:35:39,037 NOT THE POINT, JOE. 849 00:35:39,104 --> 00:35:40,372 OKAY. JEEZ. 850 00:35:40,439 --> 00:35:42,574 NOW, TONIGHT IS MY MOTHER'S BIRTHDAY PARTY, 851 00:35:42,641 --> 00:35:44,810 AND THE WHOLE TOWN IS GOING TO BE THERE, 852 00:35:44,876 --> 00:35:47,479 AND THEY ARE EXPECTING MUSIC, FAVORS, AND REALLY LARGE PIZZA, 853 00:35:47,546 --> 00:35:49,181 AND THEY WILL NOT BE DISAPPOINTED. 854 00:35:49,248 --> 00:35:53,084 I DON'T CARE HOW YOU DO IT, JUST DO IT! 855 00:35:53,151 --> 00:35:54,920 SOMEHOW I CAN'T PICTURE MERYL STREEP 856 00:35:54,986 --> 00:35:57,356 WITH LEONARDO DICAPRIO. 857 00:35:57,423 --> 00:35:58,857 I REALLY AM SORRY, NICOLE. 858 00:35:58,924 --> 00:36:00,892 YOUR PARENTS MUST THINK I'M A LUNATIC. 859 00:36:00,959 --> 00:36:03,762 I DON'T THINK "LUNATIC" WAS ONE OF THE WORDS THEY USED. 860 00:36:03,829 --> 00:36:06,598 BUT THEY HAVE A VERY EXTENSIVE VOCABULARY. 861 00:36:06,665 --> 00:36:09,235 IT'S THE FIRST TIME I MEET THEM, AND I JUST -- 862 00:36:09,301 --> 00:36:10,869 JESS WAS DRIVING ME CRAZY, AND -- 863 00:36:10,936 --> 00:36:12,271 I TOLD THEM THIS. 864 00:36:12,338 --> 00:36:15,006 WHEN THEY COME BACK INTO TOWN, I WILL DO BETTER. 865 00:36:15,073 --> 00:36:16,475 I'M GOING TO SCHOOL. 866 00:36:16,542 --> 00:36:19,110 THEY MAY NOT BE BACK IN TOWN FOR SEVERAL MONTHS. 867 00:36:19,177 --> 00:36:21,046 WHENEVER. WHENEVER. 868 00:36:21,112 --> 00:36:24,783 SO I CAN MAKE ANOTHER LUNCH DATE WITH MY PARENTS SEVERAL MONTHS AWAY? 869 00:36:24,850 --> 00:36:26,352 SURE, MAKE IT. 870 00:36:26,418 --> 00:36:28,119 TELL 'EM I'VE GOTTEN SOME MEDICATION. 871 00:36:28,186 --> 00:36:31,390 I'M MUCH BETTER NOW. I'LL DO THAT. 872 00:36:31,457 --> 00:36:34,460 GET OFF THE PHONE. I NEED THE PHONE. GET OFF THE PHONE. 873 00:36:34,526 --> 00:36:35,727 SOMEONE STOLE MY CAR. 874 00:36:35,794 --> 00:36:37,796 NICOLE, I'M GONNA HAVE TO CALL YOU BACK. 875 00:36:37,863 --> 00:36:40,632 I PARKED IT RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER, AND NOW IT'S GONE. 876 00:36:40,699 --> 00:36:42,501 WHY'D YOU PARK IT AROUND THE CORNER? 877 00:36:42,568 --> 00:36:44,102 BECAUSE THAT'S WHERE I PARKED IT. 878 00:36:44,169 --> 00:36:46,872 HOW CAN THE POLICE DEPARTMENT HAVE AN ANSWERING MACHINE? 879 00:36:46,938 --> 00:36:48,173 LOOK, LET'S JUST CALM DOWN. 880 00:36:48,240 --> 00:36:50,008 WHO WOULD STEAL THAT CAR? IT HARDLY RAN. 881 00:36:50,075 --> 00:36:53,044 THESE CHOP SHOPS, THEY CAN MAKE A BUCK OUT OF ANYTHING. 882 00:36:53,111 --> 00:36:54,713 I AM GONNA KILL WHOEVER DID THIS. 883 00:36:54,780 --> 00:36:57,549 JUST GO ON OVER TO SCHOOL. I'LL TAKE CARE OF EVERYTHING. 884 00:36:57,616 --> 00:37:00,652 YOU DON'T WANT TO BE LATE FOR YOUR FIRST CLASS, RIGHT? 885 00:37:00,719 --> 00:37:02,854 YOU WERE PLANNING ON GOING TO SCHOOL, RIGHT? 886 00:37:02,921 --> 00:37:05,190 WELL, THEN JUST WALK ON OVER TO SCHOOL, 887 00:37:05,257 --> 00:37:07,158 AND I'LL TAKE CARE OF THE REST. 888 00:37:07,225 --> 00:37:09,561 HAVE A GOOD DAY. STUDY HARD. 889 00:37:09,628 --> 00:37:11,997 DON'T WORRY. JUST LEAVE THE CAR TO ME. 890 00:37:17,736 --> 00:37:21,573 * HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DEAR LORELAI * 891 00:37:21,640 --> 00:37:25,344 * HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU * 892 00:37:27,078 --> 00:37:29,681 YOU CAN TAKE THE CAKE INTO THE KITCHEN NOW, TERESA. 893 00:37:29,748 --> 00:37:32,451 AREN'T I SUPPOSED TO BLOW THEM OUT? TERESA CAN DO THAT. 894 00:37:32,518 --> 00:37:36,522 IT'S TRADITION FOR THE PERSON WHOSE NAME IS ON THE CAKE TO DO THE BLOWING. 895 00:37:36,588 --> 00:37:38,590 I THOUGHT ONLY CHILDREN LIKE TO DO THAT. 896 00:37:38,657 --> 00:37:41,126 SHALL WE BRING IT BACK OUT AND RELIGHT IT? NO. 897 00:37:41,192 --> 00:37:45,597 WOULD YOU LIKE TO MAKE A WISH AND BLOW OUT THE TAPERS? WHY AM I BEING MOCKED? 898 00:37:45,664 --> 00:37:47,098 BECAUSE THAT'S THE GILMORE WAY. 899 00:37:47,165 --> 00:37:50,135 LET'S MOVE INTO THE LIVING ROOM FOR OUR DESSERT, SHALL WE? 900 00:37:50,201 --> 00:37:51,437 LET'S SHALL. 901 00:37:53,605 --> 00:37:56,174 How are we doing for time? We've got time for cake. 902 00:37:56,241 --> 00:37:59,611 I don't want to miss the fancy party you're throwing me. 903 00:37:59,678 --> 00:38:02,113 WHAT ARE THE TWO OF YOU WHISPERING ABOUT? NOTHING. 904 00:38:02,180 --> 00:38:03,482 CHAMPAGNE? 905 00:38:03,549 --> 00:38:05,551 TRYING TO GET ME DRUNK SO I FORGET 906 00:38:05,617 --> 00:38:07,986 THAT YOU WOULDN'T LET ME BLOW OUT MY OWN CANDLES? 907 00:38:08,053 --> 00:38:10,856 IS THIS GOING TO BE ANOTHER ONE OF THOSE STORIES 908 00:38:10,922 --> 00:38:12,223 LIKE THE BUNNY STORY? 909 00:38:12,290 --> 00:38:13,592 HIS NAME WAS MURRAY, MOM. 910 00:38:13,659 --> 00:38:15,861 OH, EMILY, YOU HAD TO BRING THAT UP. 911 00:38:15,927 --> 00:38:19,130 HOW COULD YOU THINK I WOULDN'T NOTICE YOU GAVE AWAY MY RABBIT? 912 00:38:19,197 --> 00:38:21,667 BECAUSE YOU WERE 4 AND TERRIFIED OF THE THING. 913 00:38:21,733 --> 00:38:23,969 I WAS NOT TERRIFIED. I SIMPLY RESPECTED HIS SPACE. 914 00:38:24,035 --> 00:38:26,405 YOU SLEPT IN THE MAGE ROOM FOR A WEEK. 915 00:38:26,472 --> 00:38:27,906 I WONDER WHERE MURRAY IS NOW. 916 00:38:27,973 --> 00:38:30,175 IN A SHOEBOX SOMEWHERE, I ASSUME. 917 00:38:30,241 --> 00:38:31,877 VERY NICE. AND ON MY BIRTHDAY. 918 00:38:31,943 --> 00:38:35,714 ONCE AGAIN, A TOAST TO LORELAI ON HER 36th BIRTHDAY. 919 00:38:35,781 --> 00:38:37,282 35th. 920 00:38:37,349 --> 00:38:39,084 REALLY? 921 00:38:39,150 --> 00:38:40,719 YOU'RE DOING THE MATH? 922 00:38:40,786 --> 00:38:44,222 SORRY. TO LORELAI ON HER 35th BIRTHDAY. 923 00:38:44,289 --> 00:38:45,724 HEAR, HEAR. 924 00:38:45,791 --> 00:38:48,360 THANK YOU FOR THE TOAST. THANK YOU FOR THE DINNER. 925 00:38:48,427 --> 00:38:50,261 AND IN THE SPIRIT OF THE EVENING, 926 00:38:50,328 --> 00:38:52,664 MOM, I HAVE SOMETHING FOR YOU. 927 00:38:52,731 --> 00:38:54,566 FOR ME? IT'S NOT MY BIRTHDAY. 928 00:38:54,633 --> 00:38:56,034 I KNOW, BUT HERE. 929 00:38:56,101 --> 00:38:58,003 IT'S FROM MURRAY. 930 00:38:58,069 --> 00:39:00,071 IT'S TAKEN HIM THIS LONG TO WRITE IT, 931 00:39:00,138 --> 00:39:02,908 'CAUSE OF THE HURT AND PAIN AND 'CAUSE HE HAS PAWS. 932 00:39:02,974 --> 00:39:05,343 WHAT IS THIS? THAT IS WHAT I OWE YOU. 933 00:39:05,411 --> 00:39:07,078 WHAT YOU OWE ME? FOR RORY'S SCHOOL. 934 00:39:07,145 --> 00:39:10,582 I PROMISED YOU I'D PAY YOU BACK, AND NOW I HAVE, EVERY CENT. 935 00:39:10,649 --> 00:39:13,419 THANK YOU AGAIN FOR HELPING US OUT. 936 00:39:13,485 --> 00:39:17,989 THERE'S NO WAY RORY WOULD BE GOING TO YALE IF IT WASN'T FOR YOU. 937 00:39:18,056 --> 00:39:19,257 YOU'RE WELCOME. 938 00:39:19,324 --> 00:39:20,559 OKAY, SO -- 939 00:39:20,626 --> 00:39:22,594 YOU MUST BE VERY RELIEVED. 940 00:39:22,661 --> 00:39:24,696 YOUR DEBT IS PAID. YOU OWE US NOTHING. 941 00:39:24,763 --> 00:39:26,297 YOU DON'T NEED US ANYMORE. 942 00:39:26,364 --> 00:39:27,966 UM, I DIDN'T SAY -- 943 00:39:28,033 --> 00:39:29,801 YOU DON'T HAVE TO DEAL WITH US. 944 00:39:29,868 --> 00:39:32,638 YOU DON'T HAVE TO COME OVER FOR FRIDAY-NIGHT DINNERS. 945 00:39:32,704 --> 00:39:35,474 THIS ISN'T ABOUT THAT. OH, NO? 946 00:39:35,541 --> 00:39:37,943 NO, I OWED YOU MONEY, AND I PAID YOU BACK. 947 00:39:38,009 --> 00:39:40,779 I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE MAD THAT I'M PAYING YOU BACK. 948 00:39:40,846 --> 00:39:44,249 I JUST THINK IT'S EXTREMELY UNKIND OF YOU 949 00:39:44,315 --> 00:39:45,884 TO USE THIS OCCASION TO INFORM ME 950 00:39:45,951 --> 00:39:47,553 YOU WON'T BE COMING OVER ANYMORE. 951 00:39:47,619 --> 00:39:49,387 I DIDN'T SAY THAT. THIS SAID THAT. 952 00:39:49,455 --> 00:39:50,956 LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING -- 953 00:39:51,022 --> 00:39:53,825 WOULDN'T YOU RATHER WE CAME OVER HERE BECAUSE WE WANTED TO, 954 00:39:53,892 --> 00:39:56,462 NOT BECAUSE OF SOME THREAT YOU'RE HOLDING OVER OUR HEADS? 955 00:39:56,528 --> 00:39:58,196 OH, AND YOU WOULD COME HERE VOLUNTARILY? 956 00:39:58,263 --> 00:40:01,667 I ALWAYS SAID I WOULD PAY YOU BACK. THIS IS NOT A SURPRISE. 957 00:40:01,733 --> 00:40:02,934 IT CERTAINLY ISN'T. 958 00:40:03,001 --> 00:40:05,303 I WAS TRYING TO DO A GOOD THING HERE. 959 00:40:05,370 --> 00:40:08,273 WHEN DAD GAVE ME THE MONEY, ONE OF THE FIRST THINGS -- 960 00:40:08,339 --> 00:40:11,577 WHEN DAD GAVE YOU THE MONEY? WHEN DAD GAVE HER THE MONEY? 961 00:40:11,643 --> 00:40:13,244 YOU GAVE HER THIS? 962 00:40:13,311 --> 00:40:14,446 IT WAS HER MONEY. 963 00:40:14,513 --> 00:40:15,947 IT WAS FROM THAT INVESTMENT, MOM. 964 00:40:16,014 --> 00:40:18,249 I'D APPRECIATE IT IF YOU'D STAY OUT OF THIS. 965 00:40:18,316 --> 00:40:21,352 I TOLD YOU NOT TO TELL YOUR MOTHER ABOUT THAT MONEY. 966 00:40:21,419 --> 00:40:23,121 AT LUNCH. 967 00:40:23,188 --> 00:40:25,957 DAD, I SWEAR YOU DIDN'T TELL ME NOT TO TELL MOM. 968 00:40:26,024 --> 00:40:29,728 WHY DO YOU THINK I MET YOU IN THE DAY AT A RESTAURANT, LORELAI? 969 00:40:29,795 --> 00:40:31,763 YOU KEPT THIS FROM ME, RICHARD? 970 00:40:31,830 --> 00:40:33,264 I KNEW YOU WOULD BE UPSET. 971 00:40:33,331 --> 00:40:36,167 I HAD TO GIVE IT TO HER. I WAS LEGALLY OBLIGATED. 972 00:40:36,234 --> 00:40:38,336 YOU'RE ALSO LEGALLY OBLIGATED TO YOUR WIFE. 973 00:40:38,403 --> 00:40:40,171 MOM. DON'T YOU TALK TO ME. 974 00:40:40,238 --> 00:40:41,673 YOU'RE OVERREACTING. 975 00:40:41,740 --> 00:40:44,510 DON'T YOU TALK TO ME EITHER. DON'T BE MAD AT DAD. 976 00:40:44,576 --> 00:40:46,077 STAY OUT OF THIS. 977 00:40:46,144 --> 00:40:48,113 PLEASE, JUST BECAUSE I GAVE YOU THIS MONEY 978 00:40:48,179 --> 00:40:50,616 DOESN'T MEAN WE'RE NEVER GONNA COME OVER HERE AGAIN. 979 00:40:50,682 --> 00:40:52,551 WE WILL COME OVER. 980 00:40:52,618 --> 00:40:56,387 MAYBE NOT EVERY WEEK, BUT THERE WILL BE THE OCCASIONAL FRIDAY-NIGHT DINNERS. 981 00:40:56,454 --> 00:40:57,956 NO, THERE WON'T. 982 00:40:58,023 --> 00:41:00,191 I DON'T NEED ANYBODY DOING ME ANY FAVORS. 983 00:41:00,258 --> 00:41:02,828 YOU ARE RELEASED FROM YOUR OBLIGATION, LORELAI. 984 00:41:02,894 --> 00:41:05,096 HAVE A NICE BIRTHDAY. HAVE A NICE LIFE. 985 00:41:05,163 --> 00:41:07,132 I'M GOING TO BED. 986 00:41:07,198 --> 00:41:09,134 DAD... NOT NOW. 987 00:41:22,347 --> 00:41:24,850 YOU'RE QUIET. 988 00:41:24,916 --> 00:41:28,486 I KNOW THEY WERE UPSET, HON, BUT TRUST ME, THEY'LL CALM DOWN. 989 00:41:28,554 --> 00:41:29,888 WHY DID YOU DO THAT, 990 00:41:29,955 --> 00:41:32,423 JUST GIVING THEM THAT CHECK LIKE THAT? 991 00:41:32,490 --> 00:41:33,892 RORY, I BORROWED THAT MONEY. 992 00:41:33,959 --> 00:41:36,828 BUT YOU HAD TO HAVE KNOWN THAT THEY'D GET UPSET. 993 00:41:36,895 --> 00:41:39,264 YOU HAD TO KNOW THAT GRANDMA WOULD TAKE IT PERSONALLY. 994 00:41:39,330 --> 00:41:41,900 WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE ME DO -- NOT PAY THEM BACK? 995 00:41:41,967 --> 00:41:44,770 MAYBE. THEY DIDN'T WANT THE MONEY BACK. 996 00:41:44,836 --> 00:41:46,071 RORY, IT'S NOT THE POINT. 997 00:41:46,137 --> 00:41:47,939 THEY WERE THROWING YOU A PARTY, MOM. 998 00:41:48,006 --> 00:41:51,209 DID I DANCE AROUND SAYING, "NA-NA-NA-NA-NA" 999 00:41:51,276 --> 00:41:52,678 WHEN I GAVE HER THE CHECK? 1000 00:41:52,744 --> 00:41:55,180 DID I NOT GENUINELY THANK HER FOR EVERYTHING? 1001 00:41:55,246 --> 00:41:57,515 DID I NOT CREDIT YOUR GETTING INTO YALE 1002 00:41:57,583 --> 00:41:59,184 WITH THEM GIVING US THAT MONEY? 1003 00:41:59,250 --> 00:42:01,319 YES, BUT -- NO BUTS. 1004 00:42:01,386 --> 00:42:04,790 YOU'RE NOT AWARE OF HOW HARD IT'S FOR ME THESE PAST THREE YEARS 1005 00:42:04,856 --> 00:42:06,558 TO BE INDEBTED TO MY PARENTS. 1006 00:42:06,625 --> 00:42:07,993 I DECIDED A LONG TIME AGO 1007 00:42:08,059 --> 00:42:10,428 THAT I WAS GONNA LIVE MY LIFE WITHOUT THEIR HELP. 1008 00:42:10,495 --> 00:42:14,132 I WENT TO THEM AND TOOK THEIR MONEY, AND I'M NOT SORRY I DID. 1009 00:42:14,199 --> 00:42:16,301 BUT I DON'T NEED THEIR HELP ANYMORE. 1010 00:42:16,367 --> 00:42:19,638 FINE, BUT YOU DON'T HAVE TO JUST THROW IT IN THEIR FACES. 1011 00:42:19,705 --> 00:42:22,040 YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO PAY BACK A LOAN. 1012 00:42:22,107 --> 00:42:24,910 I HAVE POLONIUS AND THE ENTIRE BANKING SYSTEM ON MY SIDE. 1013 00:42:24,976 --> 00:42:27,345 I JUST THINK YOU COULD HAVE DONE IT DIFFERENTLY. 1014 00:42:27,412 --> 00:42:28,580 HOW? I DON'T KNOW. 1015 00:42:28,647 --> 00:42:30,148 TAKE A SHOT. I DON'T KNOW. 1016 00:42:30,215 --> 00:42:32,383 MY RELATIONSHIP WITH MY PARENTS IS VERY DIFFERENT 1017 00:42:32,450 --> 00:42:33,885 FROM YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH THEM. 1018 00:42:33,952 --> 00:42:36,321 YOU ONLY KNOW THE WARM AND FUZZY RICHARD AND EMILY, 1019 00:42:36,387 --> 00:42:39,658 BECAUSE THEY'RE YOUR GRANDPARENTS AND THEY LOVE YOU, 1020 00:42:39,725 --> 00:42:41,559 BUT I HAVE A DIFFERENT HISTORY WITH THEM, 1021 00:42:41,627 --> 00:42:44,863 AND IT WAS NOT ALL WARM, AND IT'S DEFINITELY NOT ALL FUZZY. 1022 00:42:44,930 --> 00:42:48,099 SO DO NOT JUDGE ME FOR REPAYING A LOAN 1023 00:42:48,166 --> 00:42:50,135 THAT I ALWAYS INTENDED TO REPAY, 1024 00:42:50,201 --> 00:42:52,771 THAT I TOLD THEM FROM THE BEGINNING I WOULD REPAY, 1025 00:42:52,838 --> 00:42:54,472 THAT I HAD TO REPAY. 1026 00:42:54,539 --> 00:42:57,743 I WILL NOT LET THEM MAKE ME FEEL GUILTY FOR DOING THAT, 1027 00:42:57,809 --> 00:43:00,612 AND I WILL NOT LET YOU MAKE ME FEEL GUILTY EITHER. 1028 00:43:00,679 --> 00:43:02,948 I'M SORRY. THAT'S OKAY. 1029 00:43:08,353 --> 00:43:09,655 [ GASPS ] 1030 00:43:09,721 --> 00:43:11,122 GOOD, GOOD. 1031 00:43:11,189 --> 00:43:12,357 OKAY, LEFT. 1032 00:43:12,423 --> 00:43:14,726 OH, MY GOD. WHAT IS THAT? 1033 00:43:14,793 --> 00:43:18,096 THE WORLD'S LARGEST PIZZA...ALMOST. 1034 00:43:18,163 --> 00:43:21,700 THAT IS AMAZING. 1035 00:43:21,767 --> 00:43:24,069 YOU LIKE IT? 1036 00:43:24,135 --> 00:43:26,104 I LOVE IT. 1037 00:43:26,171 --> 00:43:27,839 THANK YOU, HONEY. 1038 00:43:32,978 --> 00:43:35,180 HEY, WHAT HAPPENED TO KIRK?